Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback % width Posts: 2

What should be the primary goal of universities?

htruc2005 1 / -  
Mar 16, 2023   #1
Some individuals believe that the primary goal of universities should be to provide information and skills needed for future work. Others however feel that the main objective of universities is to give students access to knowledge for its own values regardless if the information is useful for a job or not.

What, in your opinion, should be the primary objective of university education?

My essay

These days, one might posit that universities should provide students with knowledge regardless of its usefulness to students' future jobs, while others assert that work-related information is more essential. I am of the latter school of thought as motivation coming from job-oriented knowledge is more important for college to consider.

Granted, knowledge gained in universities is still indispensable for one's life even though it is not what students will apply in their job later on. Taking science-based subjects for example, which may not directly resonate with some pupils' aspiration to become an actor but these lessons help them to improve logical thinking, making them more knowledgeable citizens. However this line of reasoning is not sound because undergraduates more often than not take these lessons lightly and get distracted if there is little relation to their future jobs. This has led to the fact that most university students are dropping out of school to work part-time and earn extra money instead of attending such classes, rendering this proposal uncompelling.

I would argue, however, universities should focus on teaching subjects useful for each group of students from the beginning. With this policy, students are not only clearly oriented towards their career but also get a number of benefits from this knowledge when working. It stands to reason that pupils well-equipped with work-related knowledge will encounter hardships beforehand and be more favorable to recruiters in comparison with those who are not. Furthermore, this is also a cost-effective option for the society since companies would no longer need investment in training courses for new employees when they have acquired sufficient expertise in the school environment.

In conclusion, my stance is that pupils should be taught about job-oriented knowledge in college rather than lessons without practical connections to their future jobs. And the outside knowledge like outer space or superstitious phenomenon if not necessary can be obtained by individual reading.

I'm going to take the IELTS test in the next 25 days, could you please help me to point out what actually prevents me from getting 7.0+ in writing?
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,726 4511  
Mar 17, 2023   #2
You need to comrpess your thoughts into paragraphs of no more than 5 proper explained and formatted sentences. That means, you should not exceed the 300 word maximum marker. Keep in mind that the idea behind this exercise is to help you write quick explanations within 40 minutes, as if you were taking an actual exam in a school setting. So your paragraphs are too wordy at this point. You take too long to get to the point. That is one reason that will prevent you from achieving your target score. You cannot be this wordy during the actual test, with a self timer involved. Keep the explanation clear, but short.

There are also grammar related problems such as the incorrect use of an apostrophe when using the plural form of a word. The apostrophe is not used to indicate a plural form. It is used to indicate ownership or a time reference.

Your conclusion cannot reference a detailed explanation of your personal opinion. That should be in the explanatory paragraphs. The essay you presented will not get a proper concluding score because of this error. You should not be supporting the opinion you presented a counter point of view to in your opinion statement. Use 2 reasons supporting your paragraph instead. When you contradict your own opinion, the examiner will immediately lower the final score due to an unclear opinion presentation.

Home / Writing Feedback / What should be the primary goal of universities?