Some people work because they need money to live.
You had better paraphrase what the prompt says, for example: Some people cite money as the main incentive for their work.
business world is highly competitive
put their time and energy
I think effort is a better word.
we have to improve ourselves to be competent employees who are able to work
work as a team
work within a team
causing them to maintain their performance well all the time
This part is not necessary.
These kinds of behaviors will finally become a habit because we do it in everydaydefinitely helping and help us to develop self-discipline.