Hi, I will be in GRE AW test soon and need some feedbacks and advices.
Thanks for your time :)
"Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."
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Rituals and ceremonies are indispensable parts of a culture due to they are capable of providing a kind of identity and recognition. Without them, a culture will greatly weakened and people's identity will be diminished. However, apart from rituals and ceremonies, other important elements also help form the identity.
To begin with, rituals and ceremonies both sever for the purpose of uniting people, strengthen their belief and passing historical information. Most of rituals and ceremonies are set for historical events, or memorizing some figures, or expressing symbolic values, or severing religious goal. So when people participate into these rituals and ceremonies, they are capable of getting familiar with their own history, famous figures, myths and legends and acquiring a sense of belonging while experiencing the shared spirits and values. For instance, Chinese spring festival hold the chief spirit of prospecting for a New Year and people get together with their families eating dumplings, sending lucky money and watching lion dance and dragon dance. All these events can reinforce participations' relationship with others and the society as a whole. Another example is Chinese dragon boat festival which is memorizing a great poet in ancient time. By eating a special food named ZongZi, Chinese people remind themselves the emotional and elegant Chinese poetries and the long history. That would help Chinese understand who they are.
Consequently, without rituals and ceremonies, people would lose a perfect opportunity of knowing their own culture or religion and conveying their belief and values. For instance, the Tibetan pilgrimage in which a village of people walk and prostrate to the Holy Mountain or temple. To complete the ritual, one must walk and prostrate for several miles or even more. Thus, the ritual not only express pilgrims' belief but also steel their spirit and body. Without it, pilgrims would find themselves weakened both physically and mentally which would damage their identity.
In addition, apart from rituals and ceremonies, history, art, literature and language can also help define a culture and form the identity. Even if rituals and ceremonies are important, they are not the only option. Internet, television, library and even conversations with others could help one understand more about themselves.
To sum up, rituals and ceremonies are important roles in a culture or a religious. But a culture or a religious is defined by variety of elements, all of them are fundamental and indispensable. This is nowhere more true than on the saying: every road leads to Rome.
Let's talk about "because" and "due to."
They can be parts of culture due to the fact that they are capable...
or
They can be parts of culture because they are capable...
So do this:
Rituals and ceremonies are indispensable parts of a culture due to the fact that they are capable of ...
or
because they are capable of providing a kind of identity and recognition.
Without them, a culture will be greatly weakened, and people's identity will be diminished.
They are not roles. They play roles. For example, Harrison Ford played the role of the president in a film called Air Force One.
So...
To sum up, rituals and ceremonies play important roles in a culture or a religious religion.
Great job! Now you can make it even better by writing a little about whether or not culture is a good thing. Is culture beneficial, or is it better for each generation to create a new society?
:-)
