Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


It is said that the way we use electronic media affects negatively our relationships in real life



tranminh14032003 1 / -  
Sep 13, 2020   #1

media effect on personal relationships



It is said that the way we use electronic media affects negatively our relationships in real life. In my point of view, I believe it has both pros and cons which is supported by the reasons below.

First of all, it is undeniable that electronic devices like mobile phones, laptops... make it much easier for us to keep in touch with each other. In addition, using these modern stuffs for communicating is much more convenient and costs fewer fees than traditional ways. For people who live far away from each other, they can simply meet up through screens, which helps keep the relationship fresh and stable. Moreover, it is believed that for less embarrassment will be created during the first meeting if we get to know each other via emails,social networking... a few days beforehand.

On the other hand, sometimes, those high-technology devices are both abused and misused. It is on the cards that we no longer talk face to face when we hang out, everyone is attached to the phones and immersed in their own networking lives. This phenomena may lead to the fact that people are misunderstanding the quality of real life and life on social media. Besides, abusing electronic stuffs for entertainment will lower your interest in finding happiness outside with people then block you from getting on well with both old and new relationships.

Overall, the increase in using electronic media is predicted to be unstoppable. Neither advantages nor disadvantages will automatically disappear, it depends on how you you them. Try to counter-balance between real life and social media life in order not to ruin your relationships

TOPIC The use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationships between people. To what extent do you agree or disagree? *250 words at least

huyhoangnk01 2 / 5  
Sep 13, 2020   #2
<3 I have learnt a lot of new words and useful structures from your essay. I only note out some errors, hope it will help you.

... media affects negatively negatively affects or severely affects our ... In my point of view (go short by: In my perspective), I believe ...

... like mobile phones, laptops... (don't use "...") make it much ... In addition, using these modern stuffs (stuff is an uncountable noun => this modern stuff) for ... and costs fewer fees (has a lower cost) than traditional ways.

..., it is believed that for less ...social networking... ( you don't use ... in ielts writing because it is quite informal) a few days beforehand.

Overall, the increase rise in ...
... on how you you use them. Try to counter-balance ... (unnecessary)


Home / Writing Feedback / It is said that the way we use electronic media affects negatively our relationships in real life
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳