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SAME JOB Vs CHANGING JOBS - Discuss both views


pooneh 2 / 4  
Aug 10, 2013   #1
Hi, would you please help me with this essay and write your ideas . I need band score 7. Thank you in advance :)

Topic: Some people prefer to be in the same kind of job their entire life, but others like to change their jobs frequently. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

For years, there have been a lot of controversies over the issue of job whether being loyal to one job through the entire life or not. Some people believe that being in the same job makes one fully experienced, while others prefer to change their occupations to learn new skills. I will try to argue in details the common viewpoints of mentioned groups.

Being faithful to one job for whole life has its own merits. It can provide them with more experience and progress in their current jobs since one can promote step by step in the job and being expert in that field. As a case in point, university lecturers, as people who teach and do research for years, are clear-cut examples for clarifying the latter statement. What they eventually obtain is that they become experienced in the subjects they teach as time passes, as well as, they can find the right path of research to achieve useful results through their studies.

As stated earlier other people, however, oppose the former argument. They believe that changing the jobs commonly has its own merits. The main advantage of that is being skillful in a wider range of fields. The more you change your occupation, the more you can learn from different works. For instance, When a computer engineer change his area of expertise from program writing to web designing, he can effectively broaden his experience in two fields of programming and network designing. Nevertheless, changing the job may put at risk one's position as there is no guarantee for finding new job or achieving success in a new job, if he could find the new one.

To sum up, some people try to have a stable career to get promotion while others prefer to change their jobs for achieving new skills. I believe that doing the same job may kill the motivation of people for working efficiently. Hence, I personally prefer to experience different occupations not only for learning various skills but also for having the opportunity to have relations with more colleagues and managers.
ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 672 148  
Aug 11, 2013   #2
Hi, please find my suggestions below:

It can provide them with more experience and progress in their current jobs since one can promotestep by step(I prefer the word "gradually") in the job and being expert in that field.

Who do "them" and "their" refer to? the first part of the sentence has no subject to refer to.

has its own merits.

---> you used the exact phrase at the beginning of the body paragraphs. Avoid any types of repetition.

for achieving (use synonym, such as "gain", "obtain", etc. ) new skills

I believe that doing the same job may kill the motivation of people for working efficiently.Hence , I personally prefer to experience different occupations not only for learning various skills but also for having the opportunity to have relations with more colleagues and managers

--> I think if you delete the first sentence, you can express your opinion more clearly.

Hope this helps,
Cheers,
Ahmad
OP pooneh 2 / 4  
Aug 11, 2013   #3
thank you for your comments. at the last paragraph I want to write one of the demerits of having stable job. is it wrong? or maybe it is better to write in the second paragraph.
ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 672 148  
Aug 11, 2013   #4
at the last paragraph I want to write one of the demerits of having stable job. is it wrong?

What do you mean by last paragraph? Are you talking about the conclusion? At the first body paragraph, just support the first viewpoint. why do some people take the viewpoint 1? At the second body paragraph only explain the viewpoint 2 and why some other people think based on this view? Through the conclusion reword the thesis and give your own opinion. Just support your opinion.

Hope I could answer your question.
OP pooneh 2 / 4  
Aug 11, 2013   #5
yes I mean the conclusion, my opinion is that I am against the first group because I think it may kill the motivation of people for working efficiently and I agree with the second group ... what is the problem with this statemen thank you for your comments ;)
ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 672 148  
Aug 11, 2013   #6
I think it may kill the motivation of people for working efficiently

So, if you want to include this statement in the conclusion, you should write why this may happen- one short sentence is required to support it.
dumi 1 / 6,927 1592  
Aug 17, 2013   #7
For years, there have been a lot of controversies over the issue of job whether being loyal to one job through the entire life or not.

You need to improve clarity of this sentence. This is your hook and you need to grab the reader's attention with it.

It can provide them with more experience and progress in their current jobs

.... well, I agree with the experience part of it. But, progress can be pretty slow when they stick to one job. Generally, the ones who move climb up the ladder faster. By doing the same job, one would become a master of what he's doing. In other words, he becomes a specialist in his work.


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