Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS Writing task 2 : Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of.....



huyhuy 1 / -  
Oct 31, 2024   #1
Hi everyone, I'd really appreciate a fresh perspective on my essay and as much feedback as you can think of. Thank you :)
Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of one international organization rather than each national government. Do you agree or disagree?

Some individuals are of the opinion that whether the responsibility for addressing environmental dilemmas should primarily fall on international organization or national governments. From my point of view, I firmly believe that the responsibility should be taken on each national government with international organization taking the lead.

To begin with, there are some major rationales that support the claim that solving environmental dilemmas should be implemented by global organization. Firstly, in this day and age, with the development of industrialization, more and more factories have been built in the whole world. This will result in a large amount of gas emissions being released into the atmosphere, increasing the sea level and causing global warming. Consequently, dealing with these issues requires the collaboration of many countries. Furthermore, with international influence, these organizations can go to undeveloped countries, teaching people in the local area about the importance of the environment, which will improve people's awareness. Day by day these environmental issues will disappear on a worldwide level.

Granted, one might argue that because environmental problems transcend national borders, leading to it must be solved by an international organization. However, they should take into account that global organization is not the only factor that can deal with these issues. The local government can bring out stricter laws and policies on environmental protection. In addition, by understanding their local environment, it allows them to implement global and local schemes with more practical solutions.

In conclusion, despite the national government having a significant role in tailoring and enforcing environmental policies with their own border, the overarching responsibility for dealing with global environmental problems should be implemented by a worldwide organization.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15461  
Oct 31, 2024   #2
The work you have done deviates from the original writing instruction. You were being asked for an agree or disagree opinion as provided by the discussion prompt. Your response is not in accordance with the choices provided. To be clear:

Discussion Instruction:
Do you agree or disagree?

Response:
I firmly believe that the responsibility should be taken on each national government with international organization taking the lead.

The response clearly does not follow the prompt requirement. Therefore, your preliminary TA score will be a failing score since you will be judged by the examiner to have provided a response that is not in the expected format. What this means is that regardless of how well you discussed your personal opinion, the essay cannot receive a passing score in the end. You have to understand that you discussed a topic unrelated to the given choices. Therefore, it is clear that your comprehension skills are lacking since you did not understand the question being asked and that you were limited to only 2 possible responses for an answer choice.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing task 2 : Solving environmental problems should be the responsibility of.....
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳