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Success in life comes with 1% of Brilliance & Luck and rest of the 99% is hard work.



tamalroy1979 2 / 1  
Jun 21, 2011   #1
Thanks a lot for the Feedback. I will start working on it. I wrote one more Essay as given below. Can anyone help me to correct it or rate it...

"When people succeed in life, it is because of hard work. Being lucky has nothing to do with success in life." Do you agree or disagree with the quotation above? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position.

Essay:

there is no alternative of hard work to achieve success in life



There is a say "Brilliance and Luck is God gifted, which is only 1% of success, rest of the 99% of the success, comes from hard work". Success in life comes majorly from hard work, resilience and commitment. There is no use of having brilliance, if that person does not use his brilliance with hard work to achieve his goal.

There are huge numbers of examples to prove that hard work is the path to success and I will take one very well-known example of Abraham Lincoln. We all know that he was one of the greatest President of United States. But he achieved in life purely with his hard work, determination and resilience. He lost his wife, had loss in business, had a nervous breakdown, lost three time in Presidential election but he still did not give up and worked hard. Finally he became 16th President of United States on 1861 and stayed as President of United States unit his assassination on 1865.

Coming to the present day, we can give a very good example of success from hard work is 44th US President Mr. Barack Obama. We all know that he is the first African American President in US and he achieved it only by hard work. He is a native of Hawaii and with mare hard work he completed his Law degree from two most reputed Universities of the World (Columbia University & Harvard University). He elected as Senator of Illinois three time and later he got elected as President of US on 2009 and he achieved all just by mare hard work.

Let us see if there are any examples of success from hard work, available in line of sports. Let us talk about a very famous football player name Pele. Well this is definitely not his actual name; rather this was his nick name. We and every football player of the world accepted him as the best football player of the world and we know that he became the best player not by luck but by his hard-work. He used to practice football every-day. His coach used to hang rings from the goal post and asked him to pass the ball through these rings. With lots of practice and hard work, he sharpened his football kicking accuracy so much that, he could pass the Ball through the ring even without looking its position. This helped him to score more than thousand goals in the football world and fetch FIFA Cup three times.

So with the above examples we can conclude that there is no alternative of hard work to achieve success in life. But there are some examples which contradict to this. Let us take an arbitrary example of a person who won the lottery. Well definitely there is hard work to this case and by sheer luck, success can come to person. Let us take one more example of a person winning "Jackpot" in casino. This is also a good example of winning success just by luck. But this does not mean he can maintain this success in life for long unless hard work is done to maintain this success.

So as I mentioned at the beginning, "Success in Life comes with 1% of Brilliance & Luck and rest of the 99% is just mare hard work", is well concluded from the above examples.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Jun 22, 2011   #2
This essay reminds me of the saying, "Success is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration." Clever!

There is a saying: "Brilliance and Luck are God-given, and they represent only 1% of success. The rest of success comes from hard work."

Remember this rule: "one of the XXXXes" ----Always use a plural noun if you use "one of"...
We all know that he was one of the greatest presidents of the ...

He lost his wife, had loss in business, had a nervous breakdown, and lost three times in Presidential elections but he still did not give up and worked hard.

But there are some examples which contradict to this.

Let us take an arbitrary example of a person who won the lottery. Well definitely there is hard work to this case and by sheer luck, success can come to person. ---Great example!

Hey, so... I moved this essay to a new thread. Every time you write an essay, please start a new thread.
:-)
throllen 5 / 13  
Jun 22, 2011   #3
just 1 question, will an essay full of historic examples make a good persuasive/argumentative essay?
OP tamalroy1979 2 / 1  
Jun 23, 2011   #4
Thanks a lot. Actually I tried to open a New Thread, but somehow it did not allow me to do so. ANyway thank you very much for your feedback.

I do have a question. Is the lenght of the Essays are acceptable or do I need to increase more. Right now I am trying to keep them within 500 Words. Is it OK??
EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Jun 25, 2011   #5
If it does not let you open a new thread, it is probably because the system is requiring you to go help someone by giving some of your ideas about their essay. Write a few sentences to share the ideas you have when reading a person's essay. After you give feedback for one or two people, you'll probably be able to open a new thread.

About the length... it depends on what kind of essay you are writing. I think 500 words is a great length for an essay, but the most important thing to do is ask the people who are assigning this essay. They should give you a suggested word limit.


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