Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS TASK 1: TABLE OF JOB SKILL - a questionnaire answers



Riiskacha03 31 / 33  
Jan 20, 2016   #1
The table describes the proportion of the worker's questionnaire answer about the main skill in their professions, in 1997 and 2006. Overall, during the period, many employees determine dealing with people skill are the most important accomplishment to have, while making speeches or presentations is considered as non-priority expertise.

There was a slight rose of around 1% to 4% in some categories, such as planning the activities of others, advising or caring for costumers or clients and making speeches or presentation. A higher increment rate was experienced by dealing with, instructing or training, and persuading or influencing others which stood at 60%, 25%, and 16% in 1997, then grew to 65%, 30% and 21% in 2006, all respectively.

In 2006, most laborers decided owning knowledge, cooperative analyzing and listening others as their priority skillful management. It is evidenced by there was a enormously improvement of 6% to 9% in those dexterity. When it comes to the capability to sell a product, some workers no longer found it as important as in previous year.


  • 12540593_11978050602.jpg


ichanpants89 16 / 742  
Jan 20, 2016   #2
There was a slight rose

rise

many employees determine dealing with people skill are the most important accomplishment to have

confusing sentence, consider this change: many employees determine that skill are the most important accomplishment to have.

Always remember the common pattern about sentence which are more than one clause,, S+V connector S+V or Connector S+V, S+V

by dealing with

the usage of "dealing with" is not in a proper place, the meaning become confusing.

A higher increment rate was experienced by dealing with, instructing ...

confusing, consider this change:

a high increment rate was experienced by some aspects such as ...

- Your introduction consists only 2 sentences in which is not strong enough to be presented in the exam,
- Please bear in mind that you should make at least 3 sentences in a paragraph to make your paragraph strong,
- When you post, don't forget to give at least one space in each paragraph, it will be more helpful and easy to read.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1: TABLE OF JOB SKILL - a questionnaire answers
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳