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[IELTS]: Telecommunications technology - making lives more exciting and efficient?



welnorze 8 / 15  
Jul 14, 2012   #1
The development of telecommunications technology has enabled people to perform many tasks, such as shopping, banking and business transactions, without meeting each other face to face. What are the effects of this trend on individuals and on society as a whole?

Modern telecommunication enables the remote exchange of information that changes the way people interacting with each other significantly. This essay will analyze the profound effects of telecommunications technology on the whole society, and give author's opinion.

Telecommunication technology benefits the society in various areas. In education, people who are living in remote areas are now able to have contact with the outside world and can even go to school or study for a degree online. For instance, the Open University in the UK provides a variety of online courses to students all over the world and is popular in many countries, including China. In addition, in business, trade has expanded because of the ease of ordering over the internet, such as Amazon and EBay, and also the ability to immediately reach to clients through the internet has made it easier to solve problems. Therefore, admittedly, telecommunication technology boosts the improvement of the whole society greatly.

However, the negative effects from the development of telecommunication on society cannot be overlooked. First of all, since modern technology enable people to exchange information via network cable without meeting each other in person, the trust between each other are threaten. Some unscrupulous individuals have been successful in stealing someone's communication application accounts and pretend them to ask financial help from their friends on list. Due to the difficulties in distinguishing identity via internet, lots of cases of commercial fraud have happened. Besides that, due to the widespread of latest telecommunications skills, people are increasingly willing to meet others on social networks, such as Facebook and Twitter, by cell phones or computers. As a result, normal social intercourse by face to face has been replaced by text communication or talking with emotionless machine; therefore, the practical distance between each other is closed, however the emotional distance has been widened.

In conclusion, admittedly, modern telecommunications technology makes our lives more exciting and efficient. However, we cannot ignore its potential hazards in terms of the financial fraud and detrimental impact on people's socializing. Consequently, utilizing this technology moderately by individuals and enhancing regulations and fines by the governments over the network would be the solutions to the problems, in my opinion.

LILUSH /  
Jul 14, 2012   #2
EXCELLENT one
dumi 1 / 6793  
Jul 14, 2012   #3
Modern telecommunication enables the remote exchange of information that changes the way people interacting with each other significantly.

A good opening statement : )

This essay will analyze the profound effects of telecommunications technology on the whole society, and give author's opinion.

-------- Try to avoid this type of statements. They make the reader feel bored. Let him explore your analysis and say this in a different way:

The effects of modern telecommunication have both pros and cons that I wish to analyse in order to examine the effects of this trend on both individual and the society at large.
bingle2012 7 / 11  
Jul 17, 2012   #4
people who are living in remote areas are now able to have contact with the outside world and can even go to school or study for a degree online.

people living in isolated areas
ant it doesn't seem very sound to me that telecommunication enables distance learning

socializing

social life?

telecommunications technology

should be: telecommunication technology

Overall, I suppose you should pay more attention to your grammar, especially subject-verb matching.
OP welnorze 8 / 15  
Jul 18, 2012   #5
Thank you bingle2012.

However, some advice that you given are incorrect.

1. telecommunication= phones, mobile phones, radio, internet, LAN, etc.
2. socializing = social life
3. 'telecommunications' technology should be with a 's' since it is the work of the topic given by IETLS

Thank you anyway.

Regards,


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