Television promotes propaganda and it destroyed the communication among friends and family?

Now a day with advancing of technology, life style (lifestyle) and communication of people has (been) affected by many elements. One of these elements is media, especially television, which has an important role in people's life. I believe that this media not only not destroyed (has not destroyed only) the connection among the family and friends but also (has) increased linkage among them. My major reasons for this idea are as listed as follow (listed accordingly).

One of the major uses of the television is filling the leisure times of persons with amusing programs such as interesting films or music which make us happy. So, in the weekend (at weekends) or off days family and friends can gather together for watching some amusing programs in their home and through this way they can more visit themselves.

Also, today television has a critical role in the education of people. Educative programs have many followers among all the people from child to old; some channels have programs for teaching school lessons to students; moreover several channels are created for teaching cooking to viewers (correct it). Hence, in the at schools, party (parties) or anywhere that (where) friends or (and) family (families) meet each other they can share their information about special programs that they follow. Consequently, they have amazing topics for their conversation and these topics help them increase their linkage.

In conclusion, I think that television has good effects on the communication among family and friends. Of course, some people addicted to watch TV alone that this behavior is opposing to positive effects of TV in the connection among people.

It is a not bad starting, however try no think deeply, give better ideas. You have many grammar mistakes, work on it also.

Thank you so much for your correction. I will try to do better.

Television has emerged as a one of the most successful inventions of the 20th century. Television has become a necessity of nearly every house but the topic of discussion here is whether it has lessened the communication among friends and families ,then I undoubtedly believe, yes it has. Although I too like watching television yet I prefer to sit with my friends and family members and discuss things other than daily soaps.

I recollect the time from my childhood when there was no television at our home. We used to sit together and talk about things happening around us. But when television came to our home in the later years of my life, as my grandparents asked for the one, I observed a great change in everyone's life-style. Earlier we all used to sit together for lunch and dinner, but when the television came my father started having his food sitting in front of the television.

I believe television has also reduced the use of other healthy means of recreation like playing outside sports, dance, listening music etc. When we were young, my brother and I had the habit of playing together in the evenings but then he preferred to spend his time watching sports on the television. Earlier children were told to go outside and play but now even some parents flatter their children by saying if they will complete their homework they are allowed to watch television for an extra hour.

Television is widening the gap between all the sectors of the society. People when get time from their enervating jobs they prefer to sit in front of television, instead of going out with their friends and family to get some fresh air.

Now since television has taken its place in nearly every house I think people should distribute their time and should not waste their time watching sitcoms and soap operas , in fact there are many channels that provide us wide range of knowledge and information like National geographic , History, BBC World etc. Here I would like to mention that , all these channels make us up- to- date with what is going on in the field science and technology, economy , politics etc.. therefore spending an hour or so watching these channels is also beneficial, but other shows on television make people a passive viewer that impairs the mental growth also all these shows are really addictive. So one should wisely distribute their and should not make compromise with their mental and physical health.

Sharma, is this a new version of Mahrou's original? I am confused.

I want to tell you that you should choose one but not both words here:
Although I too like watching television, yet I prefer to sit with my friends and family members and discuss things other than daily soaps.
or
Although I too like watching television, yet I prefer to sit with my friends and family members and discuss things other than daily soaps.

...my grandparents had asked for the one, I observed ...

You don't have to write should twice:
Now since television has taken its place in nearly every house I think people should distribute their time and should not waste their time watching ...

:-) Mahrou, if you need mor ehelp, please post another draft or ask questions.

Thank you ...Susan...but I am still confused about the usage of although and yet. I read that with although , "yet" is perfect..Explain me a little more about this. Anyway, how much can I get in toefl on my essays. I have my exam just after one week.

thank you so mush susan:) . I will be thankful that you can help me improve my writing. I have TOEFL exam in may.

Oh, wait a minute, whose essay did I correct? Now I am confused. :-)


Nope. Look up the word redundant.It means you do not need both.
Although these two words accomplish the same thing in a sentence, yet only one of them is necessary.
Although These two words accomplish the same thing in a sentence, yet only one of them is necessary.

I do not know how to score the toefl, but I think you both can pass. You make some mistakes, but they are minor.