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IELTS WT2: TV HAS NO VALUE ON CHILDREN. AGREE? DISAGREE?


Inspired2012 4 / 20 6  
Nov 20, 2012   #1
Hi I have an IELTS exam coming this Saturday, any suggestions for improvement will be appreciated.
Many people believe that television programs are of no value for children. Do you agree? Why or why not? Provide reasons and examples to support your response.

It is no doubt that watching television has a huge effect on people of all ages especially for children. Although some of these presents less or no value for the young viewers, I believe that there are TV shows that intends to present educational values for children on their programs.

Many TV network companies are telecasting basic mathematical and alphabetical equations programs everyday. Take "ABC For Kids" on channel 10 in Australia for example, they are targeting young audiences of the society to watch and learn from these shows and hoping that they can use this knowledge when in class. Also, children can learn to sing and dance by seeing entertainment programs on TV. These are some ways of showing that there are significant values gained from watching the television.

In addition, many parents predisposed their children to watch television shows that oversee the value of life, family and friends. These parents use television to bond with their children as well and take this opportunity to watch and at the same time answer the questions of the young innocent minds with regards to love, care and respect for instance. Some programs also show how kissing and hugging a crying person supports them in the time of need for example, proves that by watching television this can be imitated by children.

Given that there are some TV programs that are of less value for the youngsters because it contains violence, for example, there has been an undeniable existence of valuable TV programs to watch. It is recommended that parental guidance must take place all the time.

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Nov 20, 2012   #2
Although some of these presents less or no value for the young viewers,

Since in your previous sentence you talk about "watching television" , the word "these" does not refer to the television programs. You need to make the change in one of these sentences. Better change this one:

Although some of these programs present less or no value for the young viewers.

I believe that there are TV shows that intends to present educational valueseducatefor children on through their programs.

TV show intends / TV shows intend

Some more points for this essay topic: TV is the most powerful media as it is audio visual. Therefore TV programs can have much stronger effect on educating children than any other media. The programs based on educational facts are therefore very effective in delivering subject knowledge and arousing the subject interest in children.

Also they help build a good aesthetic taste in children, if the children watch programs of good quality.
OP Inspired2012 4 / 20 6  
Nov 20, 2012   #3
Whew I often commit mistakes in subject-verb agreement. Thanks for clarifying that to me. Thanks a lot.
joythblessy 86 / 272 15  
Nov 20, 2012   #4
Hai..

I like your essay..
Some more points..

Foreign channels like BBC, national Geographic and so on are great tools for students to learn English and enrich their knowledge on environment.

:helps to know about various cultures of the world

:can educate and highlight the evils of castisam, dowry, drinking and so forth..and helps to their removal.

Best of luck for your exam...


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