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Ways to preserve any remaining wilderness areas.



shiv_riky 3 / 4  
Feb 16, 2017   #1
Nations should pass laws to preserve any remaining wilderness areas in their natural state, even if these areas could be developed for economic gain.

Write a response in which you discuss your views on the policy and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider the possible consequences of implementing the policy and explain how these consequences shape your position.

Essay

naturalness protection



The population of the world is increasing, putting more pressure on constrained natural resources. Due to human beings, many species have become extinct and it has also precipitated a rise in temperature. Human beings seem to be a natural disaster which might play a crucial role in the extinction of life on earth. Many countries have extensively relied upon their wilderness areas for economic gains. I completely support this policy due to the reasons that will be discussed in the following paragraphs.

Wilderness areas are an ecosystem in which individual components play a crucial role to keep the system healthy. From earthworms to scavengers every single organism plays a leading role in maintaining the health. There has been a lot of research that shows how trees are able to communicate with each other, and they can also provide nutrients to unhealthy and weak plants. This ecosystem is very hard to replicate and has survived thousands of years of drastic weather conditions. Human intervention proves to be fatal when some of the components are disturbed and broken. It is not easy to restore or replicate nature's creation and human beings should stop deteriorating them for economic gains.

Sustainable development is an investment in the future, though it comes at the expense of current economic benefits. This growth can be considered as an example of delayed gratification, and we will be able to reap larger benefits. Instead of focusing on short-term economic gains, nations should promote research on alternative sources of income and energy.

We should slow down and look at the impact of our actions. Global warming threatens the existence with melting glaciers and increasing sea levels. Eventually, a large part of the land will be inundated. It is possible to balance growth and environment and Bhutan is the living example of such a nation. Bhutan consumes more carbon dioxide than it produces. It is the only nation in the world with a negative carbon balance. Our world necessitates the destruction of nature for financial goals, but Bhutan, notwithstanding, sets and example of an alternative approach

It is high time that human efforts should be redirected towards the preservation of nature, instead of wealth creation. We should start thinking about our children and the future of humankind. Replicating or planting trees after destroying natural reserves is futile as the artificial ecosystem is not resilient. I strongly support this policy and would also like to see harsh punishments for the violators.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15385  
Feb 16, 2017   #2
Shivam, upon close analysis of your essay, I do not believe that you can score higher than a 3 for this work. The flaws in your reasoning are serious enough to affect the overall score of your essay because you failed to do two things. The first, is to present a competent and understandable paraphrasing of the prompt requirement. The second problem, is that you failed to anticipate the questions that can be posed regarding your supporting arguments, as well as the lack of consequence discussion and how it shaped your opinion. Both of which were clearly stated in the original discussion and both of which, you were expected to accurately represent in your essay. The failure on your part to do this shows a lack of understanding of the requirements posed before you. Which in turn, led to the lack of properly developed response on your part. Aside from that, the grammatical errors in terms of sentence structure and development also adversely affected the presentation and clarity of your discussion within some parts of your essay. The final outcome, was the score of 3.


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