Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


How to write a persuasive essay arguing for the use of school uniforms at my school?



ilovemkim13 1 / 3  
Jan 7, 2014   #1

Can School Uniforms be Popular among Students?



Topic: Write an essay arguing for or against the use of school uniforms at BASIS in the future, an essay that could be delivered as a speech to the class or school body.

In a society where diversity exists, what we wear can be provocative or offensive to certain people. In most schools; public, charter, and private; there are some minorities who are usually conservative in how they dress. With school uniforms, no school would have to worry about figuring out a dress code that accommodates these minorities.

At BASIS especially, with different students of different backgrounds attending the school, it is essential to make sure students are dressing appropriately. Teens especially, dress the most provocative in an effort to fit in and attract the same or opposite sex. If school uniforms were enforced, it would show students, but teens especially, the appropriate way to dress. Later on in life, for college applications and interviews they would have to know how to dress appropriately in order to make a good impression. The school uniforms would make that a lot easier and they will be more successful in life.

Some arguments against school uniforms may be that they stifle personality, they are expensive, and some students may be allergic to some of the material that the school uniform is made of. Yes they may stifle personality, but students can still show personality through decorating their lockers, wearing stylish shoes and socks, choosing backpacks of their style and drawing on notebooks and communication journals or even wearing earrings, bracelets, necklaces or other accessories like ribbons or ties. Are uniforms really that expensive? Yes they may be a little pricey, but it's just one price for the whole school year. Plus, parents and students don't have to go out and buy a bunch of clothes for school. Since some students could have allergies to certain material, like cotton or polyester for example, the school could send an order form on the last day of school that has to be completed within two weeks. The form could list different options for size, color, and material; this way students can at least have a say in what color they would like to wear and they get to choose the material the uniform is made of.

Some other benefits of school uniforms are: saving time and fewer problems with fitting in. School uniforms can help save time for not only the school, but also parents and students. It could save the school time because the school wouldn't have to establish all kinds of rules and requirements about dress and the school could instead focus on other more serious and important topics. It also saves students and parents time because parents don't have to waste time trying to figure out what kind of clothes their child likes and what to buy for their child to wear to school and students don't have to waste time figuring out what to wear. When there is no established uniform for school, peers see each others' clothes and what brands they wear. Usually the kids who come from a lower income family are made fun of, because they aren't dressing "cool". With the uniforms, it is hard to tell who is more "cool" based on what they wear. The uniforms instill a sense of equality in students, showing that everyone is just as "cool". Uniforms could actually shut down the whole "popular" thing once and for all.

Prangprao /  
Jan 8, 2014   #2
I like how you start your introducton and connect the main points smoothly all together. In the third passage, I think you should give more detail about why students think unifrom stiffles their personality? Like, still there are many students love to have freedom with their outfits. They think it's unfair to dress whatever they don't like, etc

Also I think the conclussion should be something that you say earlier. You can make one more passge, gather all the detail in each paragraph and summarize it in your conclusion.

I hope this may help. Good luck:)
OP ilovemkim13 1 / 3  
Jan 8, 2014   #3
Thank you for your feedback. I will take that into mind. I'll post my edited version and you can take a look at that one as well, if you wish.


Home / Writing Feedback / How to write a persuasive essay arguing for the use of school uniforms at my school?
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳