I am writing my undergrade admissions essay about how my dad's kidney failure has changed my outlook in life and would like to know what you guys think of "While celebrating mother's day i nearly lost my father" as an opening sentence?
Yes....that sounds very interesting. However, you quickly need to explain the bsckgrund as this opening statement arouses curiosity of the reader and you need to clear their mind in a creatve manner, yet it should be clear and comprehensive. We are awaiting for the full essay! .... ;)