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Help me in "Introduce two person to know each other"


-Hi batman. This is ironman. Do you know him?
-Ironman, batman is a good friend of mine. We met at the Groden city in ten years ago.
-Nice to meet you B-man.
-I-man is the richest person in New York city. He`s here on holiday. And he is a superhero. He made a suit which can make him fly.
-Wow. It`s amazing. Can I get one?
-It`s depends on the purpose why you need that.
-That`s something you`ve both got in common. B-man is a superhero too.
-Great! What`s kind of suit you want
-Now you have got something to talk about.

Oct 20, 2016   #2
Sean, the dialogue can be cleaned up in terms of proper grammar. Let me show you my idea as to how this conversation could go:

Me: Hi Batman. This is Ironman. Do you know him?
Batman: Hi Ironman. Batman is a good friend... We met at Groden City ten years ago.
Ironman: Nice to meet you Batman.
Me: Ironman is the richest person .... He made a suit that makes him fly.
Batman: Wow! That's amazing ! ...
Ironman: It depends on your need and purpose.
Me: That's something you have in common. Batman...
Ironman: Great ! What kind of suit do you need?
Me: Now you have something in common...

Sean, there was a character missing in the dialogue and that was the character doing the introducing. So I gave a marker as to when that person was speaking. Also, you should always use the full name of a person / character unless there is a specification that a nickname can be used within the dialogue. Remember to use the correct punctuation marks as well. You had instances when you used a period in place of an exclamation point which would have been the correct punctuation mark to use.
Oct 20, 2016   #3
Hi Sean, WELCOME to the forum, I'm glad to see yet another member of this ever growing family and I hope this is just the start of a good relationship, here on EF, we aim at providing you with the most accurate and credible feedback in order to enhance your essay and be ready for submission.

Now, first things first, when you're writing, make sure you have your spell checker on, you see, your title has a typo error already and this is not good, of course you can still correct it, but what about if you have submitted it already, it will be too late.

- Help me in "Introduce two person to konw each other"

Moving on to your dialogue;

- Hi batman. This is ironman. Do you know him? this pgrase is unnecessary
-Ironman, batman is a good friend of mine.
We met atin the Groden city inabout ten years ago.
-Nice to meet you B-man.
- He`s here on a holiday. Andand he is a superhero too.
-He made a suit whichthat can make him fly.
- purpose why you need thatit.
- What`s kind of suit do you want?
-Now you have got something to talk about.

There you have it Sean, I hope you keep on writing and when you do, post it here on EF so we can review and give you our feedback.
  Closed ✓


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