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question about UC ; Describe the world you come from



kevinf 1 / 1  
Oct 22, 2007   #1
i need advice on this prompt.
"Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school ď and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations."

i am thinking of writing my experience as my brother had heart problems and write what i learned, how this has shaped my futures, etc. is it a good topic to write about

EF_Team2 1 / 1703  
Oct 22, 2007   #2
Greetings!

I think that would be an excellent topic to write about! This is especially true if your brother's heart problems had a significant impact on choices you have made about your future. The advantage of a topic like this is that it can be very compelling for the reader. It is not necessary to describe in excruciating detail what emotional effect this situation had on you; just touch on your reactions and feelings, and show how you responded, your thoughts and actions.

I'd be happy to have a look at it when you have a rough draft and give you some tips!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
OP kevinf 1 / 1  
Oct 24, 2007   #3
i thought that it didn't really fit the prompt correctly though
EF_Team2 1 / 1703  
Oct 25, 2007   #4
Greetings!

The prompt wants you to describe the world you come from, and your brother is a part of that world. You might want to start by describing your family and where you live, briefly, before going into the story about your brother's heart problem, but I think that once you give it that context, the story will fit the prompt quite well.

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
allysonk - / 1  
Oct 27, 2007   #5
Aspects of my "world" or my family? - UC App. Essay prompt idea

For the first UC prompt, "Describe the world you come from, for example, your family, community or school, and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations", would it be fitting to talk specifically about my extended family, but not really about my hometown or school? My family has these crazy week long christmas celebrations every year. My cousins and Grandparents are all very eccentric and have really affected my decisions about school and my priorities.

Should I try more to involve the other aspects of my "world" in my essay, or should just focusing on my family be enough?
EF_Team2 1 / 1703  
Oct 28, 2007   #6
Greetings!

Because the prompt says "or" I would take it that any one of those topics in the list, or any of them in combination, would be all right. Keep in mind that the really important part is your dreams and aspirations, as this will tell the school the most about whether and why they should admit you. It sounds to me as if your crazy Christmas festivities would make very interesting reading! I'd go for it!

Once you've written it, I'd be happy to help with some editing, if you like.

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
mmarlene96 - / 3  
Nov 6, 2013   #7
UC 1 essay ideas - the world you come from; my dream to go into medical field

Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

I have a couple of ideas:
Me being the first to go to college
My mom or dad not finishing high school
Big responsibilities (i.e. Helping take care of my younger siblings)
Supportive family
Caring a lot about others
My dream:
To enter the medical field
vkwan - / 3  
Nov 9, 2013   #8
Hey mmarlene96,

The first four subjects you listed out can literally be combined into one powerful essay, along with your dream to go into the medical field. Understand that though the UC prompt asks for a direct answer, it doesn't ask for a limited answer. Your quality of being the first to go to college despite your parents dropping out of high school who nevertheless provide great support combined with your responsibilities at home and at school can reflect a very mature and confident personality.

Caring for others is frankly too vague. Anybody can talk about a passion for caring, but few can talk about one's history. Dig deep. If you gave this to someone you didn't know whatsoever, what are the main things you would want them to know about? Answer that, and you have your topic.
mmarlene96 - / 3  
Nov 12, 2013   #9
I'm having trouble organizing, prob. should have stated that
academics76 - / 1  
Nov 19, 2013   #10
Should I write about the qualities of a particular persons in my personal statement?

The prompt for UC is "Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations" and I am planning to write about my school. Should I write about the personality of my favourite 2 teachers. Total word limit is 500.
trinhan5795 - / 3  
Nov 20, 2013   #11
You can write what you want, AS LONG AS you can link the story you write about to your personalities. You have to show how that world affects the person you are.


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