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Development of energy-efficient devices - PTDF statement of purpose



joshbj360 1 / -  
Jan 12, 2022   #1
Please, criticize my personal statement.

statement of purpose



I studied physics major as an undergraduate, studying complex equations and understanding physical laws gave me numerous creative insights. My academic experiences involve studying long hours and under strict, principled lecturers. This gave me a hint, that graduate study would be a combination of creativity, hard work, passion, precision, and meticulous attention to detail.

During my internship and briefly after graduation, I worked at Dammuel Integrated Power Solutions, Ibadan. There we designed, troubleshot, and installed solar and inverter systems. One of the projects we handled was installing a backup power supply for University College Hospital, Ibadan. We traveled to towns and cities within the country, installing solar and inverter systems. I saw firsthand the effect of carbon emissions on the environment, especially at Port-Harcourt city. The soot was visible.

As a member of a Non-Governmental Organization, I was privileged to travel and engage with rural communities in dire need of electrical power. All this created curiosity and eagerness to go beyond Solar/Inverter installation and management. I want to design smart-energy power systems that are affordable to the rural communities, and friendly to the environment. As a result, I started looking for journals on the solar-powered induction stove. I stumbled on Daniel J. Weber. "Design of battery-powered induction stove" published at MIT journals, 2015. Using a solar-powered induction cooker that would help rural communities, reduce carbon emissions due to the burning of wood. In the urban areas, it would reduce energy dependence on the national grid. My passion led me to apply for the I-Fair 2021 (An Innovative Fellowship for Aspiring Inventors and Researchers). Though my project was not selected yet, I felt the love for the project idea through their response.

For my graduate studies, I have carefully selected three universities. Heriot-Watt is valued for its pioneering research informed by the global needs of business and industry. I have chosen Renewable energy engineering because it gives me the opportunity of developing and implement creative solutions to the problems encountered in renewable energy, especially in the capture, conversion, storage, and management.I have developed myself in software development, data science, and web development. I have engaged in several projects including designing school management software, school offline library that was loaded in a flash drive and distributed to school children. I want to expand my IT skill in the energy industry, and that's why I have chosen "IT for the oil and gas industry" at Robert Gordon University among the choices I made. Taking this course will make me become proficient in the use of modern software tools and environments and have the ability to integrate the use of tools and techniques in the framework of an appropriate development methodology to develop high-quality software solutions. I have also chosen Renewable Energy, Enterprise and Management, at Newcastle University.

Upon graduation, I would assemble a group of a like-minded, passionate team, to help me fulfill my dream of developing energy-efficient devices, most especially the Solar-powered induction stove. Though, I understand that correct business planning procedures must be followed.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15458  
Jan 12, 2022   #2
There is nothing in this essay that would be considered a response to the prompt requirements. Yes, I will agree that you wrote a very good personal statement. However, the PTDF does not require a personal statement for the MSc applicants. What they do require, is a statement of purpose. The content / information for the statement of purpose is clearly defined to the applicant as needing to discuss:

- the reason(s) for the proposed study
- its relevance to the industry
- its expected impact on national development

The supposedly relevant part of the essay, the reference to the induction stove, is not even the applicant's original idea. Rather, it is an idea that he has taken from the work of someone else. That disqualifies the "reason" immediately due to lack of originality. The relevance of the project to the industry is not well developed either. It fails to convince the reviewer that the purpose of the study will have a long lasting and international impact on the field of petroleum development on a national level. The applicant needs to try to develop a new statement of purpose, one that actually aligns with the aforementioned discussion topics.


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