hye every one, this is my first time here.. I'm applying for a master degree scholarship in information systems and they are asking me for two essays. the first one is about my study objectives. I've come up with these words, and I hope you help me with any corrections:
A goal of life
Information systems are the most important tools needed by anyone who looks for rapid development, whether to himself or to his business or even to society around us. For me, this is true because information systems, as a science, can almost improve everything. This science is vital for administration, economics, accounting, engineering and many other fields. As a demonstrator in the college of commerce and economy in Sana'a University, I would fight to teach information systems but I need at least a master degree to do so. Although this is a great objective of gaining a higher degree in IS, I also have another goal regarding business. I'll be able to start the project of my life, that is an international center of Information Systems in Yemen which will be the main reference for those who need the right and critical information whether they are investors or researchers. And I'm sure that there are many people and organizations suffer a lot of difficulty in making important decisions because they don't have the right information in the right time.
My interest in IS increased in the college because studying Computer Sciences made it clear to me that IS and Computer complement each other. I even participated in the Students Journal during my second year in college with an article that I titled "Everything needs Information Systems" which has been admired by many. My next important step in my journey with IS was a visit to the "National Center for Information" in Sana'a, and I was surprised by the amount of information that resides there. I didn't want to leave that day until I saw guards started to close doors. But I was much annoyed because of the mechanism of work there, this place offers its service only to government agencies and they provide old information. Then I realized that this is what I want to do, I want to know more about IS. After my graduation I started to teach computer applications in Sana'a University, and what caught my attention the most was the ignorance of IS as demand courses but I will make sure that they know what IS are real ly about after returning to my home.
Everything I'll learn about IS will significantly affect me as well as those around me. First I'll be able to teach IS courses and change the misconception about it. After that, I'll seek to open a department for Information Systems in the college of commerce and Economy, and I may try to convince the university leaders to establish a new college for this wide science. That's not all, I will try to spread the benefits to my society by establishing an international center for information systems. This center will provide the right information any time needed, so investors or researchers will be able to make right decisions that are direct reasons to the development of my Country.
Having a BA degree in Computer Sciences increases perceived value of the master degree in IS, simply because using computers with IS will lead to fast, accurate and more plentiful information and I'm sure that I may get the full interest of what I've learned in my undergraduate studies only after I get a higher degree in IS. In other words, I feel so lucky that I chose Computer Sciences as a field of study 7 years ago.
The utilization of IS in my l ife will affect many other people as well. Students in the college of commerce and economy will be the first. I believe they deserve to know more about this field and i t will be all useful for them. My lovely country will also get something good from me, which is not only a study objective but also a main task in my life as a citizen in this peaceful country.
Information systems are the most important tools needed by anyone who looks for rapid development, whether to himself or to his business or even to society around us. ----Wow, it is so strange that we can have a sentence like this nowadays. Info Systems Mgt sure is important, but it is funny to reflect on the fact that the Internet has only been around for a few decades.
You wrote this first paragraph very well...
My interest in IS increased in the college because studying Computer Sciences made it clear to me that IS and Computer complement each other. -----You should not just write Computer like this. You should simplify:
My interest in IS increased in the college because studying Computer Sciences made it clear to me that IS and Computer these two fields complement each other.
compliment
complement
This is SO weird!! I am trying to find the correct spelling of this word, and I see that it is spelled in 2 different ways!! It made me think my spell-checker was not working, ha ha.
I think the best way to spell it is COMPLIMENT.
:-)
Capitalize all major words of the title: college with an article that I titled "Everything Needs Information Systems"
After that, I'll seek to open a department for Information Systems in the college of commerce and Economy, and I may try to convince the university leaders to establish a new college for this wide science.-------Wow, your plans are impressive! I think they will be impressed for sure.
That's not all, I will try to spread the benefits to my society by establishing an international center for information systems. This center will provide the right information any time needed, so investors or researchers will be able to make right decisions that are direct reasons to the development of my Country. ----I think you should give more details about your plan, more short term goals... and get very specific. Anyone can say they want to do something, but it takes some work to establish short term goals.
Great job!!!
