Hi Essay Forum dwellers,
I need some help with my letter of intent. I have search the web and complied a letter, using some of your comments in this forums. Could you please check it out, whether I'm coherent, banal (couldn't think of any interesting anecdotes).
Thanks for the help!
Ben.
Prompts:
Each applicant must enclose a letter of intent written in English by the applicant including a summary of degree thesis/degree project.
For those holding a degree that does not require such a degree thesis/degree project the letter of intent should describe previous studies and academic activities related to the master' s programme.
Admission Officer
Linköping University
SE-581 83 LINKÖPING
Sweden
Dear Admission committee members:
The subjects offered by the Master of Arts in Applied Ethics program in your university have brought in much interest in me, as I have been longing to study on such an interesting course. Linköping University is one of the few Universities which offers A masters degree in applied ethics, but what makes it unique is the correlation between the theoretical and practical sphere. Hence, the implementation of philosophical theories in many area of life, from business to politics and so on. Ever since I became aware of the many wonderful theories, an intriguing sensation possessed me to figure a way to apply them to many of man's earthly conflicts. In view of this, it is my greatest pursuit to further my career through the Master of Arts in Applied Ethics program in your university and be part of Linköping's roll of successful alumni in the future.
I am 28 years old, and at the moment residing in Israel. I started my academic journey in Tel Aviv University studying for a Bachelor of Arts majoring in Philosophy in Moral and Political philosophy. At the Tel Aviv University I have accomplished about half of my degree, and attended many different aspects of the philosophy degree, such as: Eastern philosophy, logic, moral and political, Greek philosophy, Chinese philosophy, rationalism and empiricism and so on. This subjects led me to realize that my main interest lies in moral and political philosophy. Two relevant and crucial subjects to the everyday man and women, who contemplate their actions and their implications on other people. Later I finished my Bachelor of Arts and Humanities education at the Open University of Israel with a degree in Arts and Humanities, whilst concentrating my studies in Moral and Political courses on 25/02/2009.
Utilizing the skills and knowledge I have learned in my BS degree such as analytical logic, familiarizing with many political and moral theories, applying Philosophical Theories to real life problems, which all became very useful in my final paper on the subject of: "Public Funding of religious services in liberal view". The paper focused on modern liberal thinkers such as Rawls, Dworkin and Raz, and the implications of their political and moral philosophy on the question of public funding of religious services in Israel. This Paper theoretical sphere can be implemented on every country in the world. I am confident that I will like the subjects offered in the Masters program.
One of my future goals is to teach in the academe. Getting a Masters degree will get me closer to it.
Further, my resume speaks of possessing capabilities from excellent written and oral communication to having good analytical skills necessary for the intense demands of the MA work.
Furthermore, it is my intention to apply for the aforementioned MA program in your University. My first priority is to write a thesis in the Political ethics, an area which I believe can make the greatest impact on the lives of human beings in the world, an example to such an accomplishement is Philippe Van Paris's Basic Income. Second is business ethics, which is also a great area that philosophy must address, and can improve the lives of workers, the way business is being made, by inserting moral into the "cold" profit oriented way of thinking. last but not least medical ethics, which addresses many important ethical questions.
Should there be questions and inquiries, kindly refer to my curriculum vitae or you can send me email through blabla@gmail.com Or you can get in touch with mobile number 9725995883.
Sincerely yours,
Ben F.
Be more concise. You can cut out a lot of words without losing any meaning. For instance:
"The subjects offered by theYour Master of Arts in Applied Ethics program in your universityhave brought in much interests in me greatly, as I have been longing to study on such an interesting course."
Revise the whole essay along these lines.
These subjects led me to realize that my main interest lies in moral and political philosophy.
Later I finished my Bachelor of Arts and Humanities education at the Open University of Israel with a degree in Arts and Humanities, while concentrating my studies in Moral and Political courses on 25/02/2009.
Utilizing the skills and knowledge I have learned through my BS degree such as analytical logic, becoming familiar with many political and moral theories, applying Philosophical Theories to real life problems, which all became very useful in my final paper on the subject of: "Public Funding of religious services in liberal view".
This papers theoretical sphere can be implemented in every country in the world.
Furthermore, it is my intention to apply for the aforementioned MA program at your University.
My first priority is to write a thesis onthe Political ethics, an area which I believe can make the greatest impact on the lives of human beings in the world. An example to such an accomplishment is Philippe Van Paris's Basic Income.
Second is business ethics, which is also a great area that philosophy must address, and can improve the lives of workers, the way business is being made, by inserting morals into the "cold" profit oriented way of thinking. Last but not least medical ethics, which addresses many important ethical questions.
Here are a few fixes, but as Sean said, it is a little wordy.
Good luck in school!
:)
