Motivation Letter - I am willing to apply to Erasmus Mundus Joint Masters Degree Program

Last year I wrote the following letter and got rejected. Can anybody check the letter what I lacked?

Motivation Letter for Erasmus Mundus in Chemistry

After recently completing my B.Sc. (Honors) from Jahangirnagar University with a major in Chemistry, I am willing to apply to Erasmus Mundus Joint Masters Degree Program. And for this program, I have chosen to spend the first semester at the University of Paris-Sud in learning kinetics, biophysics, analytical methods, and quantum mechanics, second and third semester at the University of Porto in learning physical chemistry of interfacial, condensed, energetic systems, and applying those learned skills in building functional materials for sustainable chemistry.

The main aspect of this program that I find the most appealing is the incredible research opportunity. I have always found research as the perfect way to explore my rather limitless scientific spirit of inquiry and keep my mind constantly occupied. There is another prominent reason behind why I chose this program - getting out of my comfort zone. Exploring fascinating cultures, diverse social traditions would allow me to experience the ever-changing world. Participating in different festivals like Festival de Sintra, Berck Sur Mer Kite Festival, Cannes Film Festival and Festival of Lights would help me understand the diversity, inclusiveness, and miscellany that exists among us common people. Whether it is the illuminated candle glowing from balconies or the artistic tunes coming out of the musical theatre, the mystifying beauties lying in the world never fails to impress me. Another opportunity I would get by joining this program is the chance to learn French and Portuguese. Tackling new challenges, embracing new languages are all I ever wanted. The last reason for choosing this program is the Summer School-where I would not only get the chance to test my professional and communication ability and uplift them to a new level but also learn about various aspects of building networks.

Taking courses ranging from the Quantum, Supramolecular to Analytical, Polymer and Industrial Chemistry during my undergraduate study have provided me the appropriate background that I deem essential for pursuing a career in the relevant field and delving into advanced research works on Material Science, Electrochemistry, and Surface Chemistry.

Experiences such as working at the research project titled Biodegradable Acrylic-Acid Chitosan Hydrogel Preparation and its Efficiency in Removal of Methylene Blue Dye from Aqueous Solution and completing a prestigious internship at the Bangladesh Atomic Energy Commission under the supervision of Senior Scientific Officer Dr. Nazia Rahman have evolved my research interests into Physical Chemistry and Materials for Sustainable Chemistry. The manuscript that I prepared for the aforementioned research project is currently under review for being published in the International Journal of Environmental Science and Technology. Besides, I have also been involved in another research titled Removal of Cu(II), Pb(II) and Cr(VI) ions from Aqueous Solution Using Amidoximated Non-woven Polyethylene Film-g-acrylonitrile Fabric and the paper is under consideration at the International Journal of Environmental Research.

At present, I am using the hydrogel that I devised during my internship at the Bangladesh Atomic Energy Commission for adsorption of toxic heavy metals like copper, lead, and chromium discharged from the leather industries. I constructed the Hydrogel using biodegradable materials for removal of dyes from wastewater. When the hydrogel was kept in the dye solution, the water

purified within a short time. Our paper Investigation of Adsorption of Methylene Blue from Aqueous Solution by Acrylic Acid-Chitosan Hydrogel was accepted at the International Conference on Physics 2018 for presentation.

Participating in different volunteering activities like raising money for the poor and teaching underprivileged children helped me get selected as youth parliament member for one year. Attaining 3rd Youth Parliament on Right to Work I was able to discern the daily struggles young people have to endure. Besides, the science festivals, competitions, and seminars that I have attended throughout my whole life taught me the importance of teamwork, management, leadership and punctuality.

Studying biophysics, spectroscopic methods, and kinetics at the University of Paris-Sud, colloids, self-assembly, solid state chemistry, and nanotechnology at the University of Porto under the guidance of the distinguished faculties and access to the world-class resources would help me develop both theoretical knowledge and research skills on the relevant subject matters. The two weeks summer school after the second semester and the 6-month internship at the end of the program would be a massive opportunity for me to test my practical skills at an industrial level. Besides, learning the French and Portuguese language course would be a valuable asset for me in getting accustomed to the professional world and becoming a global citizen.

After completing my Masters, I aim to utilize my potential and skills in developing materials for a sustainable environment. I intend to leave a trail where anyone could trace my unequivocal efforts affections and hard works in the work that I do, the difference that I have made and will make in the future.

Thank you very much for your time and attention in reading my motivation letter.

Makid, from what I can tell, this is an extremely long letter that does not have a true motivational concept. The reason that your essay failed to help your application is because you wrote a personal statement, not a motivational letter. The letter tried to cover some points but ended up overly representing and confusing discussion. It is an uneven and confusing discussion most of the time. This resulted in a blurred presentation of the required discussion points and a lack of clear understanding of what you were trying to inform the reviewer about.

The letter could have been helped by professional editing since a professional editor would be able to compress the information in a manner that would have been best suited for the prompt requirements. The letter suffers from a lack of focus and a more understandable per paragraph presentation. The reviewer probably found himself lost when it came to trying to decipher that whole point of your motivational letter, which resulted in the rejection of your application.

The motivational letter should be short, informative, and always on the mark in terms of discussion requirements. A short letter that achieves that will have a better chance for application consideration than a long but misdirected letter presentation.