Occupational Therapy Personal Statement
Hi everyone,
This is my first time writing a personal statement and I hope I was able to provide a cohesive essay about why I want to become an OT. This is not my final draft, but it's pretty close. Any feedback and suggestions will be much appreciated! Thank you.
At eighteen years old, I did not possess an adequate knowledge of all the health care professions out there and I presumed pharmacy would be for me. As I was studying towards my biochemistry degree, I took my first step into healthcare as a pharmacy technician. [I acquired experience and developed higher-level people skills along with an abundance of patience.] I was content, though the patient interactions felt so brief. I started to yearn for a more involved/synergistic role, something that would require a hands-on approach. During this period, I found myself struggling, uncertain of my purpose, my grades were suffering, and I had never felt more disappointed.
As I reassessed my goals and who I aspired to be, I changed my studies to human development. I was enjoying my classes more as my grades were improving as well. My major required participation in human services, in which I volunteered at an adult care center and interned for the Vietnamese American Cancer Foundation. It opened my eyes to an unfamiliar area and it felt immensely gratifying to partake in. After I earned my bachelor's degree, I was still unsure of what profession to pursue.
There was a period where I had attended physical therapy for an injury and it struck me with an interest in the therapy world. It influenced me to volunteer and I ended up obtaining an opportunity to become a physical therapy aide. I loved working with patients, assisting them with their exercise, seeing their progress, and most importantly, being able to form a vital relationship. There was something still missing for me, but this field was unknowingly leading me in the right direction.
I found myself discouraged and frustrated and I ended up buying a career guidance book, The Pathfinder. I spent several months reading, notating, reflecting and learning about my personality, strength, skills, weaknesses, and suitable career paths. I'm not sure why, but occupational therapy was always subconsciously highlighted as I looked over the list of professions. I decided to look into this and consequently, Occupational Therapy had everything that I ever wanted in a profession: the focus of well-rounded therapy, the emphasis on adaptability, hands-on approach, and importantly, the importance of life quality. I had always envisioned myself in a profession where I would be able to help others live an independent, meaningful, and fulfilling life. Not only does this profession present all the qualities that I hold true to my heart, it would allow me to work and grow with patients over a span of time.
To confirm my inspiration, I began volunteering at a hand therapy and pediatric therapy clinic. After watching the occupational therapists work collaboratively their patients, I have been able to witness first hand the small and large impacts. It felt so rewarding to hear a patient, who was diagnosed with cerebral palsy, say that he was able to print his name on his math exam earlier that day; even though a few weeks prior, he wasn't able to write his name at all. It was simple, but it felt so meaningful and empowering to me.
This is the profession I have been searching/seeking for. Occupational therapy will provide the opportunity for me to uphold my defender personality: sensing, feeling, and judging traits. I know Occupational Therapy will allow the chance for me to improve the quality of life for many across the lifespan and at the same time, help me learn and grow as well.
Mayosauce, your essay is in good shape but there is a change you need to make.
This sentence should be
After watching the occupational therapists work collaboratively with their patients, I have been able to witness first hand the small and large impacts.
With this change, I am sure your essay correctly answers the prompt
Thank you Yankey, I've read it so many times and I can't believe I missed that.
Marilyn, as I go through your essay, what I came up with is that, the essay has a good combination of your background as a person and your goals professionally.
You wrote your essay with a good transition, the transition is properly illustrated from your personal background, your struggle in coming up and figuring out what you want to do academic wise, to the point where you finally get to the realisation of what you would like to achieve and be of service fro greater welfare.
Your essay then ended with a conviction and a promise that you will push harder in life which is the ultimate ending of your essay.
I wish you good luck in this endeavour and do let us know how it went. We'd love to hear from you.
Thank you Ishaqur!
Ivy, I appreciate your detailed feedback. I definitely want the reader to get to know who I am as a person. Since I have a weak academic background, I wanted to make sure my personal statement will make up for that. I will let you guys know the results. Thank you for your help (:
Marilyn, the essay that you wrote is too long for a personal statement. There were portions that needed to be combined, shortened, or totally eliminated in order to make the essay more appealing to the reviewer. Your statement about using Pathfinder to help you find a career places your discovery of Occupational Therapy as your chosen profession on an impersonal level. If you discovered your career from reading a book, then the impression will be that just like everything else in your academic life, you will have a strong tendency to change directions, regardless of what your volunteer / internship experience in that field is. So the essay should be revised to turn this very weak depiction of your character as a student into a positive. I believe that I have accomplished that for you below:
When I turned eighteen, I knew that I wanted to pursue a career in the field of healthcare. However, I lacked the background and exposure to the various healthcare branches that I could consider for my career. I settled on Pharmacy as the obvious choice for myself. Thus began my journey of self-discovery and learning with regards to the various occupations that i could have in healthcare.
Beginning my studies in Biochemistry with the aim of becoming a Pharmacist, I was able to develop my people skills upon entering the professional world as a Pharmacy Technician. While the work was fulfilling enough, I felt like I still had not found my niche in the healthcare world. I wanted to have more interaction with the patient than my current field offered. I desired for a more synergetic interaction with those in need of my help. The grades that I had been getting told me that I needed to change my direction, this was not the field for me.
I reassessed my goals and tried my hand at Human Development, where my grades also began to improve. Interning at the Vietnamese American Cancer Foundation during this time as part of my required class activity slowly introduced me to the world of Occupational Therapy. I found myself volunteering as Physical Therapy aid at the institution because of my interest in this field of healthcare. As time progressed, i felt that I had found the avenue of work that allowed me to have the kind of patient interaction that I desired. This was the profession that allowed me to become a direct participant in the improvement of the patient's life through exercise and therapy. While I was happy and content in this discovery, there was still one aspect of my journey that I had yet to discover. I still questioned whether this was the ultimate career for me in my chosen field. My answer was no. There was something more I wanted to achieve.
So began my volunteer work at a hand therapy clinic and a pediatric therapy clinic. Occupational Therapy was an avenue that I began to look into after assessing my current skills through The Pathfinder career guidance book. The results of which told me that I had the calling for this field, and helped me narrow down my career path. Finally, I was no longer trying on many hats in the field, trying to find the one that best fit me. This hat fit perfectly.
I have been able to witness first hand the small and large impact that an Occupational Therapist can make in the life of the afflicted. It felt so rewarding to hear a patient, who was diagnosed with cerebral palsy, say that he was able to print his name on his math exam earlier that day; even though a few weeks prior, he wasn't able to write his name at all. It was simple, but it felt so meaningful and empowering to me.
This is the profession where my calling lies and I am confident that my search has come to an end. Occupational therapy me with the opportunity to to uphold my defender personality: sensing, feeling, and judging traits. I will be given the chance to improve the quality of life for manyduring their lifetime and at the same time, help me learn and grow as well.Occupational Therapy is the career that will help me create my total adult persona.
As you can see, what I did was turn your negative talk into a positive, soul searching experience that will make the reviewer more receptive towards your "shortcomings" and seemingly "lack of focus" as a student, making him see it as a strength instead because it helped you develop something about yourself and your life. The key is to always use the negatives that you have as a strength. It takes some professional help to be able to do that. Using my decades of experience in assisting students perfect they application essays, I hope that I was able to do the same for you :-)
