admission for MS in Applied Data Science
My awakening to the wonder of data science began with my exposure to Amazon's recommendation system, Facebook's targeted advertising and Google Map's traffic prediction. Data Science is changing the world by transforming raw data into valuable information in various industries like finance, healthcare and engineering and I would like to leverage this. I aim to help businesses make informed, quantifiable data-driven decisions and direct actions based on trends in key metrics. Through the application of information analytics and statistical algorithms, I aspire to add business value by predicting demand, increasing engagement, automating tasks and optimizing marketing campaigns. Earning a master's degree in applied data science will render me the essential instruments to accomplish my career goals.
Taking up an engineering degree in computer science was my first step towards understanding real-world data-driven applications. I underwent comprehensive training in Database Management Systems, Data Structures and programming languages like C, C++ and Java which equipped me with tools for efficient data analysis. As a part of my undergraduate final year project, my team worked on a book recommendation system based on social media user profiling. We carried out text mining using a natural language processing python toolkit NLTK to analyze tweets from a user's Twitter Account. Using R language and Twitter API, we extracted and manipulated user data to create a word cloud visualization and recommended books that might interest the user. I explored Faculty Jeff Hemsley's work in social media analysis to explain viral events and Faculty Bei Yu's work in text classification and sentiment analysis. I would like to contribute to this area of research and expand my knowledge in social media analysis and web analytics to understand customer behaviour.
To dive deeper into data analytics, I took up a position at Mu Sigma Inc., one of the world's largest provider of analytics and decision science solutions. I was selected for a pilot project where I solved business problems relating to Marketing Mix, Customer Segmentation, Sentiment Analysis, and Fraud Detection in the retail and insurance domain. My work included data cleaning, exploratory data analysis and data modeling to achieve actionable insights from structured and unstructured data. I worked on maximizing profits for a leading insurance company, by reallocating its existing budget across different marketing channels. I also engaged in optimizing an existing fraud analytics model to reduce its high false positive rate.
I wish to study at Syracuse University because the data science course is one of the best in the country. It will lend me extensive knowledge in a broad range of subjects in information studies and management. The program will help me become proficient in devising adequate data-driven solutions for business problems in any domain that extends my way. My cousin is an alumnus of Syracuse University. He believes I will get ample opportunity at your prestigious institute to hone my analytical and technical skills by working with exceptional individuals in the field of data science. Being a part of the Data Science Club and Women in Technology organisation will help me in promoting awareness in my field. I would also like to experience the cultural diversity and take advantage of state-of-the-art facilities in the beautiful campus in New York. I sincerely hope that my admission to your institute for MS in Applied Data Science will be considered in all possibility with financial aid.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Akshita, you have written a pretty straightforward SOP that focuses on your abilities and professional exposure, along with a summarized college reference. Excellent work. However, the purpose for your desire to study this course is misplaced in the essay. You have it at the very start with a reference to Google and Facebook. These two being irrelevant information in the essay. The portion that goes "Data Science is changing ... my career goals." Would be more effectively placed as a stand alone paragraph after "To dive deeper into data analytics ... false positive rate." This would show the reviewer a profession related purpose for your desire for higher study in this field. This new paragraph arrangement will render the reference to the social media companies in the first paragraph irrelevant. So the opening statement should then become the reference to your college studies, which will result in a tighter and immediately informative essay for the reviewer to consider.
As for the reasons that you chose Syracuse, don't say "will help me" but rather, tell the reviewer what you hope to accomplish during your future career in relation to the training, both theoretical and practical, that you will be receiving from the university. Additionally, unless your cousin is one of the notable graduates of Syracuse, mentioning him in this essay will not be of any help. What he believed and what he became after attending the university is not important to the reviewer as it does not related directly to you or your application.
Remove the reference to financial aid at the end of the paragraph. The statement of purpose is not the same as an application for financial aid. Non-essential information, such as your inability to afford the tuition of the university is of no concern to the reviewer. That is also something that could stand as a negative point for your application. He is going to end up thinking "Why are you applying for admission if you know you cannot afford to pay to attend Syracuse University in the first place?". Do you see how it will weaken your application? That is why I would like you to not present any reference to tuition problems and scholarship discussions in this essay.
