Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Graduate   % width   Posts: 3


'Physical Therapy more competitive' - : PTCAS Admission Essay for DPT Program



keberg1 1 / 1  
Sep 14, 2010   #1
This essay comes from the Physical Therapy Centralized Application Services website for admission into a Doctor of Physical Therapy Program.

The promt reads: Which personal characteristics and motivating factors have led you to pursue the profession of physical therapy?

At this point, the essay is pretty rough, but I feel like I have some good ideas going. I would very much appreciate some thoughts or ideas as to how to make the opening sentence flow into the rest of the essay, as well as some possible changes throughout the essay. Thanks in advance for any comments!

All across the country, physical therapy programs are becoming more and more competitive, and the most qualified and dedicated individuals are being selected to enter. I can recall, all the way back in the 3rd grade, listening to fellow classmates parents as they spoke to us briefly about their personal careers, and how important it was to try your best in order to succeed in school. Being an athlete and sports fan my entire life, I specifically remember listening to one girl's father who worked in sports medicine/athletic training. He talked about how much he enjoyed his career because he loved sports and enjoyed being around the athletes and helping them recover from injuries so they could regain mobility and continue to play. It was from this point on that I was positive I wanted to be in the medical field, specifically in a rehabilitation setting. Returning home from school that night, I told my parents what I wanted to be when I grew up, and can remember how proud they were of my lofty goal. Being raised in a catholic family and attending a private catholic school for much of my childhood, I quickly learned the importance of being humble, forgiving, self-disciplined, honest, and the hard work needed to achieve excellence. A framed quote I grew up with in my room and have since taken with me to college reads, "Hard work is painful when life is devoid of purpose. But when you live for something greater than yourself and the gratification of your own ego, then hard work becomes a labor of love."

It was during my junior year in high school that I solidified my interest in becoming a physical therapist, unfortunately due to undesirable circumstances. I suffered from a torn ACL during the high school football season, and had to undergo surgery and go through physical therapy myself. The thing that really stuck out for me when receiving my treatment was the extended one-on-one time that physical therapists spend with their patients. I can only remember seeing my surgeon a few times during the whole process, which made it difficult to establish a relationship and high level of trust with the doctor. The extended time physical therapists spend with their patients allows them to directly monitor their patients' progress and establish a sort of direct relationship with their patients. It also allows the patient to develop a trust with their therapist.

During my years in college, I have developed a love for understanding the human body, and the very intricate but delicate way in which everything works in synchrony....

ershad193 14 / 321  
Sep 15, 2010   #2
All across the country, physical therapy programs are becoming more and more competitive, and the most qualified and dedicated individuals are being selected to enter.

Admissions essays are not the place for making obvious statements. This sentence doesn't give any new information to the reader, and hence, is a waste of space. Sorry for being so blunt. Try to make every sentence count.

Your second sentence also suffers from the same problem.

For me your essay actually starts from the third sentence.

I quickly learned the importance of being humble, forgiving, self-disciplined, honest, and the hard work needed to achieve excellence.

This is all fine, but it would be better if you can highlight those with the help of some personal experiences or examples. Do you know what I mean? Anyone can say they have those qualities. It's up to you to distinguish yourself from others.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Sep 16, 2010   #3
"Hard work is painful when life is devoid of purpose. But when you live for something greater than yourself and the gratification of your own ego, then hard work becomes a labor of love."

Sounds like just another way to gratify the ego. When nationalism or religion or some other conceptual stuff becomes something you live for, it makes your life supremely important.

That is not a criticism of the essay, just an idea that came to mind when I read the quote.

Capitalize Catholic.

This is a very good essay. I think you could do a little more to tell why you choose this profession, though. You have 2 or 3 main ideas about why -- the support they give patients, the experience from childhood... I think the major ideas in the essay could be expressed in just a few sentences, and that would give you room to intensify the essay by adding more ideas. For example, i bet you learned a lot about the ACL when you had that injury. What other things have you learned about modern PT methods and concepts? Add more substance to this essay if you can. I think it is looking great, though.


Home / Graduate / 'Physical Therapy more competitive' - : PTCAS Admission Essay for DPT Program
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳