Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Graduate   % width   Posts: 5


SOP for German University - Master of Computer Science Smart Systems



zaall 1 / 2  
Dec 27, 2010   #1
Levan Zaalishvili's Statement of Purpose

The Essay has to be about 600 words. my SOP is 656 is it normal? Please write comments.

Thanks in advance .

It's difficult to remember when I first touched a computer. My first relationship with computers started with playing games at the age of 6. I became extremely curious when I saw the Yamaha YIS-503II MSX computer for the first time, which had its own monitor and keyboard, when I reached seventh class in my secondary school and took private lessons in programming. Nowhere were there programming classes in secondary schools in Georgia, because computer science absolutely wasn't developed in my country at that time. I started learning Qbasic language and fulfilled my wish to write my own program. I extended my knowledge by writing simple games and solving mathematical examples by programming.

While in higher classes I joined in programming competitions and conferences. One of my competitive programs for conferences was: making a graphical program to demonstrate the solution to mathematical equations. When the user selected an equation icon, the result would be a graphical block-scheme of the logic of the solution in addition to displaying its program steps. This program would be excellent to introduce both logic and programming to beginning students.

While in undergraduate school, I joined a volunteer programmer group where we did a lot of projects and offered them to our University to use as teaching examples. During my master's study in Computer Technologies at Telavi State University, I was a volunteer teacher of information technologies and C++ to the bachelor degree course students and worked as a teacher's assistant, involved in building of network infrastructure between buildings. I researched available wireless infrastructure and offered a new wireless security infrastructure to the university which was based on my master's degree thesis about wireless network security. This was an excellent opportunity to utilize my theoretical knowledge in practice because laboratories which currently exist in Georgia don't meet high standards. Since that time I am working at Telavi Vocational Education and Training Centre as a teacher of information technologies, PHP and C++ programming. I am involved in building CISCO IT classes which is also a great chance for using theoretical skills in practice as well in IT systems while improving my programming skills.

In spite of my experience during my bachelor and master study this is only a small step toward becoming an advanced specialist. Because computer science is in the developing stage in Georgia and it's almost impossible to receive high quality practical experience from university because there aren't modern laboratories where you can receive deep knowledge in your specialty. That's why the European education system is an interesting path to receive this kind of education. It is a chance for me to gain advanced knowledge as well as practical experience in big companies or in advanced laboratories.

I want to pursue my knowledge in computer science and also receive a deeper knowledge in IT than I have now. Designing solutions to advanced problems is my greatest desire. I wish to earn my master's degree in computer science and after completing it, I wish to pursue my specialty in a PH.D program.

I would then like to continue performing research in software development such as analyzing software problems which are out of date in the new technical environment and finding innovative solutions and implementing them. Working on new scientific problems is my enthusiastic challenge and I look forward to discovering their solutions.

My aspiration in applying to Computer Science - smart system programs at "***** University" is the excellence of this program and university. It is distinguished in both its program structure and the many possibilities during study. It will also allow me many options after completing it, such as continuing on a PHD track or involving research in big companies which will be an unprecedented chance in my development.

I will be extremely grateful if I am allowed to join your University, which will be a new path to my future scientific and professional life.

rajeshaaidu 2 / 31  
Dec 27, 2010   #2
Dear Zaalishvilli,

On the matter of length, it depends, many a time if they have told 600 words, and you have to upload it- it's possible that you will not be allowed to upload anything more than 600 words. So, please check it first.

First paragraph is having diction problem, please try rectifying it- A 7th class kid is not suppose to have that much thinking, how much you have written in your retrospect. I think your parents have kept private tutor and you have started learning and at that time. It's better if you will discuss- what has fascinated you from your past experience. You still need to work on flow of your writing.

Thanks and best of luck!!!
OP zaall 1 / 2  
Jan 4, 2011   #3
Dear Kumor,

I don't remember exactly it was 7 or 8 class but it wasn't no more than 8 class, also there were very simple examples by which I started how write very simple programs. I didn't expand it because it became far more than 600 word. Will it be normal if I write 8th class ?

Can you write your opinion also another part of my SOP?

Thanks in advance .
EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Jan 7, 2011   #4
I think your first 2 sentences are unhelpful, and you can make the essay better by cutting them from it. That way, it would start like this:

t's difficult to remember when I first touched a computer. My first relationship with computers started with playing games at the age of 6. I became extremely curious when I saw the Yamaha YIS-503II MSX computer for the first time, which had its own monitor and keyboard, so when I reached seventh class in my secondary school and took private lessons in programming. ---Now it will begin with that sentence that has the word curious. I think people immediately become curious when they see the word curious, so they will be immediately interested in your essay! :-)

Less is more. Cut the unnecessary words:
I want to pursue my knowledge in computer science and also receive a deeper knowledge in IT than I have now.

This essay will be more impressive if you mention some of the articles you have been reading recently, because that will show how proactive you are (instead of passive). Show that you are proactive, that you are reading a lot of articles about very recent research. :-)
OP zaall 1 / 2  
Jan 8, 2011   #5
Thank you Kevin for your attention on my SOP.

How I said, I have limit of word. It has to be about 600 words.
Of course I'm reading some of the articles from my specialty but I thought that it's more important what I did in the past than what I'm reading now. If I add also what you said, I think it will be far more than 600 words.

Thanks again ;)


Home / Graduate / SOP for German University - Master of Computer Science Smart Systems
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳