Personal statement for applying postgraduate courses in filmmaking and directing fiction

Hello,

This is my personal statement to apply postgraduate course for filmmaking/directing fiction. I will use the bones of it for different schools so I didn't mention any specific school name. The word count has to be below 1000.

seeking opportunities to be a director in the future

I have always seen myself as a storyteller, and I do believe there is always a way to tell an excellent story, only if the teller could find it and only if the teller has his/her own point of view on it. After more than seven years of experience working as a professional filmmaker in Triangle Film - a Shanghai commercial production company, I am seeking opportunities to change my career lane to be a director in the future, and develop my own storytelling style.

In my junior year in college, I adapted Christopher Nolan's film <Following>, and shoot it with my schoolmates from drama club. I liked this film so much for its story structure and the way he edited it, audiences could find the truth only by pick up all the puzzles director leave, and the way to find the puzzles is already designed by director, you can not get out of it but follow it. Though it is already a mature and complete story, I find a way to make the changes. I added two parts in the beginning and ending to make the whole thing as a dream or an illusion of the hero, who claimed himself a writer in the film. Then all the characters in the film become the roles in his book. This adaption seems not making too many changes, but it changed the whole base of the story, so that changed the whole view for audiences for this film. We showed this film in school then, I felt so happy when I hear audiences suddenly realize who is the real controller with "Ah..." at the ending of the film, rather than I hear them clapping when the credit list rolling against black screen. This film enhanced my confidence of chasing a career as a filmmaker, and I truly love the way that a team work toward the same goal and inspired each other, which is also the essential of filmmaking.

I started my professional career as a production assistant after graduated from college, I was trained and worked in all aspects in the company. From scouting the locations to casting talents, from writing production schedule to sending the color grade materials, like a sponge in water, I thirstily absorb whatever the task assigned to me, and meanwhile enjoying the feeling of enriched rather than stressed by the pressure of it. Thanks to the high density of work, after two years when the company promoted me to work as the assistant of executive producer, I found myself have already stand on a very solid fundamental of production skills. Although I entered the industry from the production side, I always remind myself to think like a director, on one hand by observing how does a director think and work, then analyse or even ask them the reason of why they direct like that; on the other hand, I kept absorbing from books and movies, to watch more than one time to dig deeper into it rather than just for entertainment.

Working in the executive producer team gave me a better view of the whole project and lead me to consider the production from a bigger picture. The best part of it is, benefited from my English skills, I started to work closely with foreign directors and learnt from them during practical work. Andreas Grassl, a German director, who showed me how organized and rigorous a director should work; British director Nigel Simpkiss became a good friend of mine because we fought shoulder to shoulder on a minus 30 degree Celsius ice lake for a night car shoot; and Jansen&Rodriguez, the Italian director duo, taught me how to find the beauty and passion from life and bring it into film.

After proved myself being trustable by the crew, and handled very well for client's requests, I noticed that I already get used to stand in the center of the team when I get the executive producer position, which is the closest position to stand with director, think and work with director. When I am practiced at organizing the crew, communicating with clients, and controlling the budget, as an experienced executive producer doing the basic duty. Consciously I can separate my energy to involve more with director's work, plan the board with director from the beginning, think of how to achieve the best effect, look for the best solution rather than the easiest. Some directors treat me as a partner, so that I can share my thoughts with them freely. That was the time I realized I am prepared with production skills and should take a step further to take the role of director, to be a real story teller, which has been the strongest desire since I was young.

I feel that I still need a systematic mind to complete myself besides the practical experience. And I'd like to have a pure environment to think and make films with a group people who have creative and fearless mind as well as endless enthusiasm. Thus, film school is the best and only choice for me. The reason I choose this school is because it offers hand-on courses which could provide chances for students to find the problems while making films, and also gives a theoretical reflect which support students to find solutions. The school encourage a fresh approach to emerging technologies, encourage original thought, and develop intellectual and critical approaches to making films. This course could inspire me and allow me to do experimental attempt to develop my own film language, and further more to prepare me an excellent storytelling director in the future.

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I have few doubts for the statement looking for help:
1. I tried to focus more on my professional working experience as I don't have a relevant academic background, is this ok or should I explain more about why I don't choose filmmaking in college?

2. What existing elements could be cut? What elements or information is missing?
3. How is the flow of the statement, is it interesting and cogent?
4. I am more than happy to hear feedbacks about the grammar and vocabulary which could improve this statement in a better written English.

Please feel free to comment beside what I listed up there.

Thank you all in advance for the feedback!

Jason, since you are talking about a career change for yourself, you must first justify why you didn't enroll in film making school when you entered college. The personal statement allows you to give the reviewer a clear idea about why this want your first career choice. It also gives you the opportunity to show how you feel into the movie making world as a director. Now, while your essay shows the logic in your decision to become a film maker, what is missing is a discussion of how you developed the heart of a director and a passion for film making beyond being a producer. That it's why, even though your essay is detailed and long, it doesn't justify the development of your interest nor does it show your promise or potential as a filmmaker.

Dropping notable names of people you worked with, but not showing how they taught you to become an informal director doesn't help. You need to at least show that you became an assistant director or unit director during the course of your work with these people or that you learned some rudimentary directions lessons while on the set. Otherwise, the only proven discussion in this essay is that you are a producer, not a director, at heart and by passion. I'm sure that isn't what you were aiming for right?

You had a good introduction to film making with the Nolan reference, but then you lost track from there. It is important that your personal statement indicates how you posted an informal dedication as a director during your time as a producer. You do not show any of these elements in this essay. Additionally, you can improve your content by explaining why, even though you lack formal academic training as a director, you feel that you can complete this MA. Convince the reviewer that you can succeed when, by all accounts, it appears you will fail.

The grammar is the least of your problems with this essay at the moment. Get your discussion on track thematically first. Then you can think of editing the presentation and working on the grammar for the final version.

Thank you Holt for your detailed feedback, here is the revision, please let me know what you think.

I have always seen myself as [...], and develop my own storytelling style.

While graduated from high school, my parents were against me to apply a major about filmmaking, because to study in an art college cost much more than a normal school, and the rate of employment after graduation is not high. So I compromised and went to a business college in Shanghai, but the fire of being a director has never disappeared in my heart.

In my junior year in college, I adapted Christopher Nolan's film <Following>, and shoot it with my schoolmates from drama club. I liked this film so much for its story structure and the way he edit it, audiences could find the truth only by pick up all the puzzles director left, and the way to find the puzzles is already designed by the director, because of the storytelling tricks. Though it is already a mature story, I still find a way to make the changes. I added two parts in the beginning and the ending to make the whole thing become a dream or an illusion of the hero, who claimed himself a writer in the film. Then all the characters in the film become the roles in his book. This adaption seems not too many changes, but it changed the whole base of the story, it changed the whole view for this film. We showed this 65 minutes film in school then, I felt more happy when I hear audiences be suddenly enlightened at the end of the film, than I hear them clapping after the film finished. This film enhanced my confidence of chasing a career as a filmmaker, and I truly loved the way that a team work together for the same goal and inspiring each other, which is also the essential of filmmaking.

I started my professional career as a production assistant after graduated, I was trained and worked in all aspects in the company. From scouting to casting, from writing production schedule to sending color grade materials, like a sponge in water, I thirstily absorb whatever the task assigned to me. Thanks to the high density of work, after two years when the company promoted me into the executive producer team, I found myself have already stand on a very solid fundamental of production skills. Meanwhile, I never forget to train myself to be a director, I made several short films for my friends to use in their weddings, each time I tried a different style to avoid repeating myself. Gradually I feel it became more natural for me to control the rhythm of the film. I have directed an one minute video trailer for the drama <Brothers by the sea>, the drama was also directed by me in my spare time, and public played for two weeks in Shanghai at the end of 2012.

In the executive producer team, I started to work closely with foreign directors and learnt from them during practical work. When work with Swiss director Marcel Lanegnegger, I worked as his first assistant director for a TOYOTA job, and I shoot separately with the second unit DOP for a metro scene. Marc Schoelermann, a German director, who asked me to help him to supervise the complex CG work as the post director for a HUAWEI project. I wrote a director's treatment for the Italian director duo Jansen&Rodriguez after a brief discussion, to pitch for the LYNK&CO job and finally win it, client said the treatment is so precise and complete to show how the film would look like, which is exactly what they want.

After few years working as an executive producer, I proved myself could handle well for different kinds of project, and I practiced a lot to be a director in the work and off work. I realized I should take a step further to be a professional director, a real story teller. But I feel that I still need a systematic mind to complete myself besides the practical experience. And I would like to have a pure environment to think and make films with a group people who have creative and fearless mind as well as endless enthusiasm. Film school is the best and only choice for me at this stage. I have trained myself to write scripts, consciously to act the director role as much as I can, keep watch movies and read relevant books to teach myself, am prepared with production skills. I believe I can get a good improvement from the MA course even I do not have an academic background. This time my parents also supported me because as now they believe I can make a good career in this industry and they have seen I have prepared this for a long time.

The reason I choose this school [...] storytelling director in the future.

Hi Holt, could you please check this out and let me know what you think of it.