Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Graduate   % width   Posts: 5


Struggles of an African in South Korea - IMPROVing MY WRITING for a future position



bobifrank 2 / 1  
Aug 19, 2016   #1
struggles of an African in South Korea

A coworker recently asked me about my impressions of Korea, after having spent two years there and honestly it wasn't quite easy for me to give him a straight answer. My whole Korean experience left me with mixed feelings and it was visible through my reservations. In the rush of coffee making and ringing up customers at Starbucks where we both worked, an answer to such a question seemed like a pretty tricky exercise of acrobatic gymnastics. I wished to give an honest answer without coming off as rude or insulting to the country or its people. I, therefore, decided to write about it. I thought writing would be a better medium for expressing exactly what my feelings were about living in Korea. These are the struggles of an African in South Korea.

I had moved from Ukraine to China and from there to Korea, excited and hopeful about a country that-I thought, was a virgin land for black people and therefore one immune to discriminations. But I was extremely wrong. If I had to compare Korea to my previous places of residence, it was psychologically the toughest I had experience. Discrimination although very present in Korea is, however, subtle. Take for instance the labour market. Although Korea provides legal residence permit to job seekers who have studied in local institutions, it is almost impossible for most foreign students to actually secure a job. All jobs applications require a resume with a picture, an addition that allows employers to discriminate. Most Africans in Seoul or at least the ones I knew were either a student or in manual labour with the exception of a very small number of fortunate ones who had decent jobs. Africans work in factories, farms, and in the construction industry independently of their level of education. It is almost as if black people can't do anything but low-level jobs. In addition, even in the teaching sector -the most common job for foreigners in Seoul, it is rather challenging for black people to find schools that are willing to hire them. The reasons provided to decline to hire an equally qualified black person although subtle are not less insulting. "it is the Korean culture", or "the parents think kids will be scared if the teacher if black" you will oftentimes hear.

It is however, important to understand the cultural context in Korea before jumping to any conclusions. Korea have always been a very homogeneous society closed to anything foreign. In fact, Korea is with Japan one of the most homogeneous societies in the world. And despite Seoul's skyscrapers, its very efficient public transit, the economic progress, and the rush for technology, things still pretty much function the old Confucian traditional way. People still bow to greet even if it really is just a greeting. Elderly people are still revered, modern Koreans still care very much about social doctrines and being shamed by their peers and, a foreigner is a foreigner. In the past, people with dark skin were peasants who spent their time out on the sun farming. They were considered to be of a lower class just as the blacks today, which probably explains the enthusiasm for skin lightning in modern Seoul. These cultural aspects have transcended the ages to coexist with the spectacular modernity forming what seemed like an odd combination. All those elements shape how Koreans view black people. Africans are perceived as poor, uneducated and low. White Americans are considered desirable, cool and smart. It is very normal to read job posts that stipulate "European looking only" because Korean customer for instance prefer a white cook or waitress. A year ago, someone even accosted a fellow African friend shockingly asking him how he knew how to use a cellphone and wondering if they had any in Africa. I personally had never had such low self-esteem anywhere like in Korea.

Another element of discrimination is the culture of the looks that prevails in Korea today. Korea is the first place I was told I was ugly because I was black sometimes explicitly and very often implicitly.

Some will blame my position to an unfortunate experience that need not be generalized. I agree. I don't know the stories of all Africans in Seoul. I did have my share of misfortune that could have played a role. My best friend of nearly eight years had simply disappeared in Seoul cutting all contacts and putting me in the center of a legal battle with his landlord over his three months of unpaid rent. I paid half the money to be able to recover some of my belongings I kept at his. In another situation, while living alone, I woke up a night in pain from a chronic joint condition I have. I directed myself to the neighbourhood clinic when the nurse called the police because she was afraid of a black man walking in the hospital's hall. She chased me away like a beggar before running into one of the rooms. I ended up in the middle of a police investigation even though I could barely walk. I Agree, all these unlucky events could have affected my opinion but I lived similar situations in Ukraine, and worse. However, my general view of Ukraine is quite positive. I received a lot of support in Ukrainian, made a lot of friends that helped me overcome my challenges and most people made me feel very welcome and entitled although I was black. My skin color was rarely mentioned. At least never seriously. In Odessa or Kiev as long as you spoke Russian or Ukrainian you were Ť Molodoy Tchelaviek ť which translates as "young man". So, not all Africans living in Seoul will have a similar story to mine but the many I know can testify of this truth the situation isn't very encouraging.

Do I have anything positive to say about Korea at all ? Many I will say. The opportunities Offered by the Korean government to outstanding African student to come study in Korea is one of those things. I am very grateful to the Korean government for these opportunities. I benefited from one of those knowledge sharing experiences and can tell you I was thrilled. It has really changed my life by shaping my worldview and equipping me with skills I needed to better confront the demands of the labor market. Africans have a lot to learn from Korea. Korea's struggle to achieve development and good governance are outstanding considering where it started. I also met the love of my life in Korea to whom I recently got married. None of my misfortune makes me regret having lived in Korea at all. It was a learning experience that awakened a yearning desire for equality in me that I never had before. I think I was pretty candid about most things prior to moving to Seoul and going through what I have been through helped me understand I had to stand up and try to make things better.

dinafayna04 5 / 7  
Aug 19, 2016   #2
Hi, Franklin. I have some suggestions for you :

Firstly, please avoid to write this words "It is...."I found many "It is" on your essay, you can remove it or replace it with another words.

1st Paragraph :
- I, therefore, decided to write about it.(what does it mean? Reader can not understand it easily)
- ... years there and honestly it wasn't WAS NOT quite easy for me to give ...

2nd Paragraph :
- I had moved from Ukraine to China and from there to THEN Korea...
- If I had to compared Korea to WITH my previous places of residence
- Discrimination although very present in Korea is, however, subtle.<< what is that ???</b>

3rd Paragraph :
- It is <b>H
owever, IT IS important to understand the ...
- Korea have always been HAS a very homogeneous society ...

4th Paragraph :
- ... of the looks that prevails in Korea today THESE DAYS.
- Korea is the first place THAT I was told I was ugly becauseI was black sometimes explicitly and very often implicitly. (be careful with repetition)

I hope it will be helpful, keep writing ! :)
justivy03 - / 2265  
Aug 19, 2016   #3
Hi Franklin, I have a few thoughts to share.
First of all, as a foreigner to a land, one can expect discrimination, there is a certain level of course, however, as it is not your own, you should be ready to this kind of welcome and even more so, prepare for the worst, this is the right attitude that you should prepare yourself whenever you visit, let alone stay and be a resident of the country. Korea, like most countries that is ruled by strict policies and rulers, you have to be very careful and cautious with your actions, also, it is recommended to follow the rule of the land, which applies to everywhere a person goes.

Moving on to your writing style, I believe this essay can be enhanced with the focus on your sentence construction, you tend to pour a lot of ideas in one sentence, with the hopes that this will boost the sense or the thoughts of the essay, the truth is, it makes a very confusing sentence that affects the entire essay and this will bring the essay down.

Furthermore, the essay says "Struggles of an African in South Korea", you managed to portray the exact approach and response for the essay, however, as South Korea became your home for a while, I believe it will not hurt if you input a little bit of good stuff by the end of the essay, now, don't get me wrong, I understand the struggles you went through but I know that you also gained from this experience and lastly, I strongly believe that, in every experience that life throws at us, there is always a lesson to be learned.
OP bobifrank 2 / 1  
Aug 19, 2016   #4
You clearly haven't read the Essay at all or at least not in its entirety! And no, you don't go to a country expecting to be discriminated against it is simply not true! And who told you I didn't respect the law there? This is an editing forum, not a debating one. I think there is stronger discrimination in Korea than In China and Ukraine ! It is a fact! That country sucks for Africans! I have lived for years in Europe never have I ever felt the way I did in Korea. Why am I not writing about that? Why choose Korea instead?

if you want to edit my essay go ahead, if not please take you privilege and your racism elsewhere.
justivy03 - / 2265  
Aug 19, 2016   #5
Hi Frank, my apologies if you think I'm trying to get into a debate with you, rest assured that this is never the intentions of posting or reviewing your essay. My point is, as what you've mentioned, Korea has a stronger discriminatory nature than in Ukraine and China, having said that, I believe you agree that, in every country, there is a certain way that people think of other people, even their own, let alone foreigners. Now, editing your essay and every single post here on EF is our main goal, with the hopes of creating an even stronger and confident writing project, moreover, we also try and strive in giving insights to everyone, in order to create a good team atmosphere, don't get us wrong when we mention or we go against what you think or see and even experience in a country you visited or you lived in.

You can expect that here on EF, we will not only edit or suggest further enhancements in your essay or projects, we also want you to learn from us, as we learn from you.

Moreover, I didn't mention and have no intention of judging or saying that you didn't respect the law of the land, what I meant was, when we go and visit a foreign land it is just and recommended that we follow the rule of the land, just like anywhere else and I believe that this is true when people would go and visit Africa too.

Nevertheless, I did read and understood as well as reviewed your essay and as a conclusion, I believe it needs a little help in creating far better sentences that will convey the message you are tying to pass on to your readers.


Home / Graduate / Struggles of an African in South Korea - IMPROVing MY WRITING for a future position
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳