Prompt: A one page, double-spaced statement explaining you educational and career goals and how they pertain to the master's in Public Health program.
The first time I spoke about health in a public forum was during a two-week speaking engagement in the Philippines. It was on that night that I realized how in love I am with health and humanity. The decision, however, to study Public Health was not love at first sight, like how I hoped my future career choice would be. Nevertheless, a smoldering passion ignited. Like most epic relationships, it started as an unconscious camaraderie. I see in Public Health the personalization of a global responsibility. As multi-faceted as this field is, it was this factor that cemented my decision to become a Public Health professional with an emphasis on health education. I aspire to work with community-based organizations and schools to establish long-lasting and far-reaching ideals in the minds of men, women, and children that are aimed at prevention and maintenance of health on every level. I am in love with ministering to the holistic needs of communities and the individuals that provide culture and life to them.
After squandering three years of my undergraduate studies and feeling caught up in the endless cycles of "studies of," I was hit with the reality of poorly formed habits: an extra year of tuition and menacingly low GPA. I've since learned that to maintain and prevent is easier than to rectify; my transcripts can attest to that. The reality, which came before my trip to the Philippines, caused me to step back and reevaluate the opportunities that I was given, the effort I'd been putting forth, and what I wanted to do with my life. After I changed my major to one that was better suited to my professional goals, I've been afforded the privilege to speak to groups of adults and children about the need to live healthily and worked on projects that allowed me to put into practice the theories I learned from introductory Public Health courses such as collecting population samples and evaluating implementations.
Florida State University's Master of Public Health program carries a special appeal in that each student is given foundational knowledge and then equipped with tools to that enable them to create a concentration that solidifies the capacity that they endeavor to serve in. Words cannot describe how grateful I would be for the opportunity to be a part of this program and for a chance to prove myself on a graduate level.
Hello Shurell,
I actually like your play on relationships here. I think that it is smart and something I haven't seen before. However, what really kills your personal statement is your negative talk. I tell clients over and over, do not highlight ANYTHING negative in your personal statement. Personal statements are suppose to be as strong as you can make them. Using words such as "squandering three years," and "menacingly low gpa" combined with your relatively short interest in Public Health(time-wise) will make any reader doubt your seriousness. To make your essay stronger remove all negative references. Replace this with more examples of how you have played a role advising others on health matters. If you really feel the need to talk about your poor academic performance, do so in a separate small essay or just send an email to the director of admissions for the program. -admissions essay advice
Thank you so much for the advice. I never thought of that and I will definitely change it up and upload the revised one. Thank you!!!
REVISED GRADUATE ADMISSION SOP
PROMPT: A one page, double-spaced statement explaining you educational and career goals and how they pertain to the master's in Public Health program.
The first time I spoke about health in a public forum was during a two-week speaking engagement in the Philippines. It was on that night that I realized how in love I am with health and humanity. The decision, however, to study Public Health was not love at first sight, like how I hoped my future career choice would be. Nevertheless, a smoldering passion ignited. Like most epic relationships, it started as an unconscious camaraderie. I see in Public Health the personalization of a global responsibility. As multi-faceted as this field is, it was this factor that cemented my decision to become a Public Health professional with an emphasis on health education. I aspire to work with community-based organizations and schools to establish long-lasting and far-reaching ideals in the minds of men, women, and children that are aimed at prevention and maintenance of health on every level. I am in love with ministering to the holistic needs of communities and the individuals that provide culture and life to them.
Prior to traveling to the Philippines, I had already taken the first step towards realizing my potential by changing my major to one that was better suited to my professional goals. My trip to the Philippines caused me to step back and reevaluate the opportunities that I was given, the effort I'd been putting forth, and solidified the capacity in which I wanted to serve humanity. Before I could educate others about this newfound passion, I first had to be fully convicted and as a result implemented the basic health principles that I was studying. I've been afforded the privilege to speak to groups of adults and children about the need to live healthily and I can now draw from personal experience. Because Public Health touches every aspect of life, I started a year-long workshop with my peers for undergraduate freshmen that focused on sexual integrity and how to maximize their roles as young men and women making a difference in their communities. I've also worked on projects that allowed me to put into practice the theories I learned from introductory Public Health courses such as collecting population samples, evaluating implementations, and researching and developing solutions to major public health issues like adolescent pregnancy.
Florida State University's Master of Public Health program carries a special appeal in that each student is given foundational knowledge and then equipped with tools to that enable them to create a concentration that solidifies the capacity that they endeavor to serve in. Words cannot describe how grateful I would be for the opportunity to be a part of this program and for a chance to prove myself on a graduate level.
