I am writing my Canada Visa SOP. I would like to add the introduction in unique way.

Statement of Purpose

Technology has revolutionized every aspect of human life. We can see the impact of this revolution in education, health and medicine, manufacturing industries, security etc. My name is Shirish Bharatbhai Soni and I would like to portray myself as passionate, enthusiastic, . 50/50 four times in a row in four State Board Exams marked my performance in Computer practical exams. I absolutely loved working with computers and this interest over the 11th and 12th grew into a passion which led to the career choice of Computer Engineering.

Having good grades in Computer during my High School, led to the strong foundation of computer fundamentals which helped me to achieve the score of 8.75 CGPA during my Bachelors of Engineering in Computer Engineering. During my coursework, I have studied an important subject related to computer science such as Database Management System, Analysis and Design of Algorithms, Data Mining and Business Intelligence and Artificial Intelligence. Using the knowledge of these subject, during my final year I have worked on Data Mining Project Medical Stock Forecasting System. In this project, we used past medical and weather data to analyze the pattern and then predicting the future requirement of medicines. By implementing this I came to know about my interest in Pattern Evaluations and Data Science and hence decided to pursue Masters in Computer Science.

After searching many universities, I came across the University of Regina who offered perfect coursework for Masters of Science in Computer Science with subjects like Knowledge Discovery in Databases, Machine Learning, Uncertainty Reasoning in AI. With Co-op opportunity, I can also get good Industrial exposure for the same. The University of Regina has Guarantee Advantage Program for all the student who has completed their 30 credit hours. This program is designed to assist all the students to achieve their personal goal by conducting one-to-one sessions with counselors. I have been Vice President of the Student Chapter of Association of Computer Engineers on campus, Manager of Student Activity Cell, Creative Head of Events and Cultural Head of Events, too. We have as a team organized very successfully several events that have added to the campus milieu. I have also brought laurels to my institution by winning coding contest held by Topcoder and also won twice in university coding competitions.

Canada is better option to pursue Masters because of its quality of education which has global recognition. Being a computer science student, communicating with different community people is one of the core things of this field. Canada's diverse and vibrant culture welcomes student from all around the globe thus helping to work with all community background peoples. Due to such vivid cultural experiences, I can develop myself both educationally and personally. With such cultural as well as educational benefits Canada also offers lower tuition fee rates compared to other countries who have similar kind of educational facilities.

India's IT sector is booming with opportunities and also has become key growth driver of our economy. By having international exposure in the field, I can be part of renowned IT companies of India such as Flipkart, Myntra, Fractal Analytics etc. The field of Data Science is growing constantly as more people are joining online communities. Due to such huge amount of user data, the requirement of data scientists is constantly increasing in the Indian market. These conditions are ideal to persuade a professional career upon my return.

I sincerely hope that you would consider my application as favorable.
SHIRISH BHARATBHAI SONI

Shirish, you need to change the start of your essay. It carries information that is not relevant to your Canada visa application. Rather than opening it with information about technology and going all the way back to your high school days, open the essay instead with a statement regarding the current status of Data Science or IT in India in relation to your current employment. Discuss your current profession, what your capacity is as an IT or data professional is, who your current employer is, and why you want to earn a masters degree in Canada. Additionally, explain that your company is allowing you to take a year long leave of absence to complete your studies and that you will be returning to the same company once you earn your masters certification.

It is important for you to mention whether or not you have already been admitted into a masters degree course at the University of Regina. If you have not been admitted yet, then indicate when you hope to hear news about your admission to the university. That shows the visa officer that someone on the other end will be taking responsibility for you upon your arrival. In this case, aside from mentioning the university, you will need to explain what kind of accommodations you will have in Canada. Indicate who will be financially responsible for you, where you will be staying, and how you plan to keep yourself financially stable for the duration of your studies without having to become a working student. FYI, don't mention that you plan to apply for scholarships in Canada to fund your studies. That is frowned upon because as a foreign student, you are expected to shoulder your fees and other expenses unless you were pre-awarded a scholarship by the university or you are sponsored by your company for higher education.

Discuss your academic plans and whether or not that includes an internship program under the university course program. Relate how that will help to prepare you for the next step of your career , at the same company that has given you a leave of absence, upon your return to India. After that, indicate that you look forward to having a formal meeting with the visa officer to further discuss the details of your application.