Writing Feedback / Some people deem that children should be brought up in a rural area than the city [3]

Some people think that it is better to raise children in the countryside than in the city.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this point?

Contemporarily, some people deem that children should be brought up in a rural area than the city. From my point of view, I partly have the same ideal with that statement.

First of all, rural areas are surrounded by the nature with many local things themselves. Kids living in rural areas often have a strong connection with places where they live. For instance, they often have a thing for protecting the environment not only in their town but also the other places. One more important example of that is that children will realize the true significance of nature. If children live in cities, to a certain extent, they may not realize how vital the environment gives them.

The other reason that raising in the countryside is better than the city for kids is that they will know the real things happening in their lives by their eyes, not by any documentary movies or books. To make sense of that, for instance, many children living in cities know many sorts of trees or birds by reading schooling books or watching films, yet they do not know how to distinct grass and rice in the fields. Students leading their lives in rural areas will learn things naturally themselves, not by any hard-touching things in books.

On the other hand, raising children in the city also has some beneficial effects. One important of them is the overall education. Quite a few cities have a mountain of places that kids can take part in to educate themselves not only on the subjects they are learning at school but also soft skills. Children can emerge themself in English by talking with foreigners walking in the park which is those living in rural areas cannot. It means that studying new and modern things seem to be easy for city-children.

To conclude, many reasons can prove that children raised in the countryside will gain much more beneficial effects than in the city, although still exist some things that rural areas have yet to satisfy.

(I hope that I can get your feedback about my writing and your score for the essay)

Writing Feedback / Staying at hotels when holidaying abroad is not the method to comprehend a nation and the people liv [2]

Some people say that staying in a hotel in a foreign country when on holiday is not the best way to get to know about the country and its people.

Do you agree or disagree?

To some, staying at hotels when holidaying abroad is not the method to comprehend a nation and the people living in it. From my point of view, I consider myself in agreement with the statement.

For a variety of reasons, it would be wrong to reckon that having an oversea holiday to learn about a country and its people is the best method. One of the main reasons is that hotels always offer tourists good and luxury services to confine them within the hotel zone to enjoy those services. It leads to the notion that quite a few tourists frequently be too lazy to discover the nation they are traveling just because of spending time on the services of the hotels. To make sense of that, for instance, quite a few hotels provide luxury meals and playing rooms to tourists so that they may take a whole day within the hotel zone.

Another reason is that doing so causes tourists to fail to obtain the knowledge they want in an oversea country. Therefore, people cannot realize the local culture or even what happens outside the zone of the hotels when they are in that zone. Quite a few harmful impacts may place pressure on local tourism because of transferring the wrong information about the country by tourists. To several tourists, sharing wrongly the knowledge they know is frequently happen, because sometimes they do not realize the knowledge they obtained is the case or not.

To conclude, my point is that if tourists want to comprehend more about a foreign country's culture and people, just go out of the comfortable zone and experience more so that they can know whatever they want. (281 words)

Thank you for reading my essay, hope you to tell me what I need to improve my writing skill as well as what aspects that my essay needs to be corrected are.