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Posts by minhhuyenle [Suspended]
Name: Le Minh Huyen
Joined: Jun 25, 2021
Last Post: Jul 3, 2021
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  
From: Viet Nam
School: Le Thanh Tong

Displayed posts: 3
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minhhuyenle   
Jun 25, 2021
Writing Feedback / Writing Task 1 - the proportion between male and female in Australia, who commonly did exercises [3]

Percentage of Australia men and women doing regular physical activity in 2010



The given data illustrates the proportion between male and female in Australia, who commonly did physical activity in different age groups, in 2010.

Overall, it can be seen that the frequency of women doing physical activities are much higher than men during the period of ages. However, at the end of period male shows an upward trend while female dropped unsteadily.

Looking at the figures, female has the highest percentage throughout the period, rising from 47.7% of 15 to 24 to 53.3% of 45 to 54 years. However, this percentage decrease slightly during every decade, only 47.1% of over- 65 year- old are doing exercise in late adulthood.

Conversely, at the beginning of period, men shows a downward trend after peaking 52.8% in ages of 15 to 24 years, these percents fell dramatically to 39.5%. But in the following ages of 45 to 54, the line rose slowly from 39.5% to 43.1% and continued to rise and peak at 46.7% at the older group towards the end of the period.
minhhuyenle   
Jul 3, 2021
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2: Printed vs Online Newspapers and Books - support your opinion [4]

Your writing showcases a good balance between simple and complex sentences, although the effective use of sentence length cannot be easily measured.
However, you may use a thesaurus to replace or reduce your usage of the following words and/or phrases in your paper:
[i]I think, a lot, Last but not least, good, really, go, and so, more, take, think.....
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