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Posts by adelaide1119 [Suspended]
Name: glenda
Joined: Jun 26, 2021
Last Post: Jun 28, 2021
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  
From: Viet Nam
School: ha tinh gifted for student

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adelaide1119   
Jun 26, 2021
Writing Feedback / Ielts Task 1: Causes of worldwide land degradation (over-grazing, deforestation, over-cultivation) [2]

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table show how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

.

The pie chart illustrated the great causes of land degradation whilst the other chart mentioned how the consequences of bad agricultural land impacts on three regions in the 1990s.

Overall, the pie chart discussed three main reasons which over-grazing affected the most. Meanwhile, Europe was the area that included the greatest land degraded.
Accounting for nearly two fifths in total (35 percent) , over-grazing became the main point leading to debasement of the quality of land.
Standing behind it was recognised by deforestation with 30 percent and over-cultivation which took less than deforestation at 2 percent. Besides, others experienced the smallest number that was below 10 percent.

Relating to the region, the area which was regarded as the most significant land degraded was Europe at 23 percent . The second belonged to Oceania where overgrazing took up the most versus North America with over-cultivation and Europe with the others<b></b>



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adelaide1119   
Jun 28, 2021
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK2 Essay about main purpose of school and university [3]

I appreciate the idea of your essay. It's very clear that i can follow your train of thought .However, in the 3rd passage, i think you should give the reasons why others agree with their idea first instead of giving your own idea.
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