Writing Feedback / Comparative Essay for ENG 1100... subject: Depression [3]

This is a simple comparative essay contrasting depressed individuals to healthy individuals and their expectations of depressed individuals. I feel that it in someway isn't an effective comparative essay, but I can't really figure out why I feel this way, because I feel pretty comfortable with my work. However, I have ADHD and I might not have communicated well enough. Can you advice me on how I can better organize my essay?

I repeat! This is a simple comparative essay. We had minimum requirements on the essay, only that it should be simply put, a comparison between two like subjects. Advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you for not deleted my post...

" For someone who hasn't experienced severe depression, it can be difficult for them to understand why it can be debilitating. What they don't know is that depression isn't an extended case of sadness. Depression is a real health problem that interferes with every aspect of a person's life. Depression usually occurs after an individual experiences loss or trauma. It attacks people from all backgrounds, from children to expectant mothers and the elderly. It is usually characterized by long periods of deep sadness that interferes with daily functioning. Once acquired, minor things can easily upset the individual, while normally enjoyable activities will hardly faze him or her. Depression is different from regular sadness in that it can lasts for months or even years. It is usually accompanied by guilt and self-defeating behavior. Sadness is an emotion. Depression is an emotional disorder.

Depression is a disease that effects 5% of the global population. It is caused by an excess of monoamine oxidase in the brain. In a healthy individual these enzymes would break down excess mood-related chemicals such as serotonin and melatonin, leaving the necessary amount needed in order to react to daily stimuli without too much difficulty. In a depressed individual, MAO-A is produced in excess causing essential chemicals to be destroyed. Without these neurotransmitters a person can have difficulty functioning. Serotonin, one of three major neurotransmitters. It is responsible for processing endorphins that cause stress. Serotonin helps people relax. A person with depression usually has decreased levels of serotonin, making him/her more vulnerable to stress. Dopamine, another neurotransmitter effected by MAO levels, regulates how we respond to pleasure and pain. Among other neurotransmitters affected are norepinephrine, histamine, and melatonin. In a healthy individual these chemicals work together to keep the body functioning properly. They control emotional responses, sleep patterns, digestion, and other major functions of the body.

A successful individual is expected to be productive occupationally, socially, and personally. Not only are people expected to work efficiently at a job, but to maintain social relationships, and to fulfill family obligations. All of these many interactions are fueled by aforementioned neurotransmitters that tell the mind how to feel in certain situations. They help maintain feelings of stress and anger and keep the individual working towards his/her goals. They are what motivate us even in the face of defeat and keep us hoping for a brighter future. Depression sucks all motivation out of an individual making everyday tasks and obligations impossible to complete.

Though depression is a disease emotional in nature, it can affect an ailing person in many areas of life. Depression makes it impossible for an otherwise healthy person to function which can cause said person to lose interest in maintaining their physical health. Depressed individuals are more likely to skip meals and daily cleansing rituals, eventually destroying their immune system. These individuals are more likely to complain of body cramps, and are more likely to be affected by weather changes and viruses. Many people may overindulge in fatty, unhealthy foods, while others may refuse to eat all together. In many cases, people with eating disorders have an underlying case of depression.

Depression is an indiscriminate disease. It could attack any healthy person, destroying his/her life if it goes untreated. Some people suffer from acute depression that leaves after a time, whereas some people suffer from chronic depression which is incurable. Some people will never suffer from depression. You can't single out people that are more likely to "catch" depression. Both depressed and healthy people have goals in life. They exist on all spectrums under all conditions. The only thing that differs from the depressed and the healthy are a few neurotransmitters, or lack thereof. However, through talk therapy and drug therapy, a person with depression can function normally in society. There are drugs that increase neurotransmitters in the brain and filter MAO making it possible for individuals to function normally."

This is such a tiresome process.

Writing Feedback / Failed Descriptive Essay Subject Costa Rica [2]

I have trouble writing for my English teacher. I just can't connect with her. I find that to better understand my professors I must be able to understand their very soul. That's a little much, but either way, I can't connect with this woman and I believe she hates me. She is the bane of my existence. Once again, please ignore my ridiculous statements. I was required to write a Descriptive essay, but I wrote about a subject that didn't particularly please my teacher. My first attempt was based on a squirrel that eventually evolved into a narrative. That being said, I took a drastically different approach and wrote my Costa Rica paper. the teacher said we could describe a person, animal, or scene. I screwed up and missed the plot entirely. That being said, I have no idea how to turn an essay about Costa Rica into a essay dedicated to a scene in Costa Rica. Granted, I have great memories from the place. I just find it hard to pick one.

I am able to edit my paper. Would it be smarter to start a paper based around a scene Costa Rica, or scrap the idea and write something slightly easier?

"Costa Rica is a treasure hidden from the majority of the world. When many people think of paradise this small country may not come to mind. After all, it is only one of the many countries that make up Central America. The entire country is only 19,700 sq miles in size. The island is made up of many large volcanoes that sprung up from the ocean during the prehistoric era. It is bordered by the Pacific Ocean and the Caribbean sea as well as the country of Nicaragua and the country of Panama.

Looking at Costa Rica on a map, it reminds me of a scene in the movie, The King and I. The schoolteacher shows the children a map with Siam. One of the children protests out of disgust. He is so enamored with his country that he can't accept the idea that Siam is dwarfed by other countries. On a map, Costa Rica fails to stand out. It is not large and it isn't isolated. However, Costa Rica is much more then ink on paper, and a world map can serve it no justice.

Its name is Spanish in origin, meaning "rich coast". It is a well deserved name for a majority of the country is made up of coast with two separate bodies of water bordering it. On one side, you can float in the aquamarine depths of the tropics, and on the other you can marvel in some of the most beautiful sunsets in the world. The sand in Costa Rica is very different than most sand you'll see. It is various hues and shades of earth, an abundant array of powdered coral, sediment, and volcanic ash. Many tourists can be found sleeping on the beach, solely to enjoy the softness of the sand.

Because Costa Rica is an Island made up of many volcanoes, the terrain changes abruptly from coast to mountains. The island is constantly blanketed in an emerald glow. Because it is located near the equator, the season is constantly cycling through summer. Plants are always green and growing. Costa Ricans take pride in their country for its thriving wildlife. The Flora and Fauna of Costa Rica are very respected by the world because the country contains 5% of the world's biodiversity with both plants and animals. Because of this Costa Rica is also one of the cleanest and greenest countries in the world.

I remember marveling at the beauty of this country. I was amazed by the beauty of the place. It was truly a hidden paradise. The land stretched literally from under the sea all the way to the sky. You could scale one of the many volcanoes and gaze down upon the clouds. In Costa Rica, you can almost touch God. Costa Rica is heaven on earth, hidden in the clouds. It is a diamond in a sea of glass. In Costa Rica you wake up happy to greet the day ahead. The sun has already risen by five in the morning greeting you for another day of rainbows and kaleidoscopes of colors. Vibrant hues of pinks and greens and blues embrace you. The air has never been sweeter, the day, brighter. Even the birds seem happier.

Of course most people never experience the sheer awesomeness of Costa Rica. Many people view it only as an obstacle to skip over when traveling around the world. Why go to Costa Rica when you can go to Italy or Russia? If I had the choice, however, to go to any one country, I would travel to Costa Rica."

This is my original craptastic expository-wishing-it-were-descriptive essay.