Undergraduate / Victorious Little Umbrella Essay - Boston University Essay [5]

Very Good! I really like the intro. Interestingly, "victorious little umbrella" is unique and it will make you stand out. You also give details about why the three words describe you.

Undergraduate / Yale Supplement - the Pitbull's grin [22]

Love it! This essay is truly unique.

I don't think there is a limit on the length of the essay. Your essay is sure to keep the admission committee's attention the whole time.

If you want you can add more about how Buddy makes a difference in your life or how you view life thanks to him.

Undergraduate / common app: the world is small - OPINIONS? [2]

Hey articbunny, thanks for the help on my essay. It made a huge difference.

[clouds are no longer as high as they were before] you might want to put not as high as they... longer and high do not seem to go together

[Apples aren't] no contractions. you can put apples are no longer

[looked so small and far away.] (this?) small and so distant

[My mother's shadow used to be so long.] so her shadow is no longer long?

[Now mine matches hers in length.] my shadow instead of mine

you can say I used to see my mothers shadow as long. now our shadows match in length.

Even many of my

They moved; they drifted; they looked a different direction and walked away before I could tap their shoulders and ask, "Do you remember me?"

[I've kept some; I've lost some; I've found new ones.] replace it w/ friends

[But they are still mine. ] they who? what? hourgalss, fingers, friends, shadow

[I had never met this person? If that person didn't exist?] a person

WOw! I like your essay. The intro is catching then it drags a little but it is awesome towards the end.

Undergraduate / 1. Would you tell us about a few of your favorite books - University of Chicago [6]

I like it. This is unique and they add com will remember it. It not only talks about Jordan but also about you. It was a great choice to pick fave experience.