nhl_2010
Nov 13, 2010
Essays / Essay on the use of exams; requiring students to pass a standardized test [2]
Hey Nounours,
I think your essay is all right ( I am not Lit major though ) but I do have some advice :-
1) I think you're essay requires a solution. You state that standardized tests won't improve educational standards. Then according to you what will ? I think you should state that.
2) Instead of making a statement , I think its better if you ask a question. Fo ex
"But even if a student gets a 100 percent on their exam, doesn't mean that it will remember it the next year."
Can be written as :-
"Let us say a student does get a 100 percent on their exam. Does it mean he or she will retain every bit of information that she was taught in the previous year?"
A statement can be refuted. But a question will force the reader to come up with an opinion.
3) Vocabulary. Synonyms make an essay look great.
4) Proof reading. :- "Second, if a students fails their exams. Does it mean that he/she is dumb? Not at all, it is possible.."
"Secondly, if a student fails their exam, does it mean that he or she is dumb? Not at all. It is possible..."
:- "But even if a student gets a 100 percent on their exam, doesn't mean that it will remember it the next year. "
" But even if a student gets a hundred per cent on their exam, doesn't mean that he or she will remember all they were taught the next year."
Just some advice. I am not a maestro when it comes to essays. Hope all that helps you.
Hey Nounours,
I think your essay is all right ( I am not Lit major though ) but I do have some advice :-
1) I think you're essay requires a solution. You state that standardized tests won't improve educational standards. Then according to you what will ? I think you should state that.
2) Instead of making a statement , I think its better if you ask a question. Fo ex
"But even if a student gets a 100 percent on their exam, doesn't mean that it will remember it the next year."
Can be written as :-
"Let us say a student does get a 100 percent on their exam. Does it mean he or she will retain every bit of information that she was taught in the previous year?"
A statement can be refuted. But a question will force the reader to come up with an opinion.
3) Vocabulary. Synonyms make an essay look great.
4) Proof reading. :- "Second, if a students fails their exams. Does it mean that he/she is dumb? Not at all, it is possible.."
"Secondly, if a student fails their exam, does it mean that he or she is dumb? Not at all. It is possible..."
:- "But even if a student gets a 100 percent on their exam, doesn't mean that it will remember it the next year. "
" But even if a student gets a hundred per cent on their exam, doesn't mean that he or she will remember all they were taught the next year."
Just some advice. I am not a maestro when it comes to essays. Hope all that helps you.