Undergraduate / "I was the only Latin American student," common app- significant experience [NEW]

hi i will like some comment and help with his essay it says min 250 words and i have 257 u think i should write more.. grammar is horrible.. please help thanks

Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.
- The last year has been a very delightful experience for me, as well as hard. As an exchanges student I went to the United Kingdom, to St Austell a small town in the south of England where I was the only Latin American student. The beginning of the year was hard for me, leaving my country specially my own language brought difficulties that further more I could done. For my accommodation I choose a host family, they have been particularly welcoming and treat me like their own daughter, spending time with them helped me improve my English, and understand the English culture. Going to an English school, college, like they call it, has been weird for me, as they only study 4 subjects and sometimes just three, choosing them was awkward for me, as I always do the subject my school told to do, but I knew that the English education was well recognized around the world so I did not have anything to worry about which subject I will choose.

Living wit h a host family, discovering a new culture, studying in an English college, and leaving my own country has made me become more independent, mature and open minded, it has particularly made me appreciate what I have left behind, like my family and friends. But it has given me great opportunities to discover my strengths, make new friends from around the world, see new places and improve my English. I am really excited to see the challenges that moving to United States will brings.

Graduate / 'Business and mathematics have been in my life always' - Imperial College Master for Finance essay [4]

Personal Statement

I believe the future of any organization depends in part of how it addresses the challenges in a competitive environment and develop best practices for the benefit of it, guided by the environmental trends and making predictions. I am a Colombian Industrial Engineer who believes that mathematics is useful in business and finances to solve these issues. I make the decision to apply for Master in Finances at Imperial College because the curriculum contents combine areas about I feel passionate such as mathematics, statistics, modeling and data analysis. As well, I would be pleased to pursue a program related to my professional interests and to my life project. Furthermore this is a prestigious program ranked as number 1 according to Finantial Times in England. It would be an honor to take classes with professors who have a broad experience in financial sector such as Walter Distaso and Dr. Lara Cathcart.

Business and mathematics have been in my life always. My parents have been involved in footwear business so they taught me that everything in the life is a business and a science, and that I should win everything for my merits. My own kind of business as a child was if I got a good grade in kindergarten my parents would be happy, so I might receive their congratulations and get a candy on the weekend. My love for candies and my material dreams to have dolls and props made me set up my own business. So I started selling candies to my friends, and by the age of 10 I got to know the value of money and in this sense mathematics was my allied.

I have always being a responsible, disciplined and studious girl that despite of my short age in that moment, I had big goals. At school I competed in math Olympiads getting the first position twice. When I was 16 year old I made the decision to finish high school in England. This was a great and challenging experience to me because I separated from my family for the first and for a long time. I had to carry the responsibility of myself, but this helped me to define what I wanted to do with my life and to see the world from another point of view.

Then I grew up and my love for numbers increased too. So I decided to study Industrial Engineering because it involves the three areas I love: numbers, business and finance. Along my undergraduate studies, I pursued emphasis subjects in statistics. At the moment, I am working in a consulting company as a Financial Consultant focused on business strategy financial and management controls areas assessing banking and energy sectors enterprises. I daily work assessing financial risk by using programing and financial tools.

On the other hand, my passions in life are to learn as much as I can, to apply the knowledge I own and help people teaching them. I strongly believe in Nelson Mandela's quote: "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world". When I was undergraduate student I was teaching assistant in different subjects such as differential calculus, introduction to general engineering and physics II. Furthermore I was a volunteer in a project organized by my university called Fenicia. In this project I thought mathematics and computational sciences to unprivileged children.

During my degree I always wondered how Asiatic people do business and how they manage to work in the harsh conditions so often portrayed in the media. So I decided to see it with my own eyes and after some tests and patience I found a job in a garments factory that provides clothes to brands like Zara, Mango, etc. In this factory I had the responsibility to optimize the inventory management minimizing both the losses and the costs of inventory maintenance. The most difficult part living in India, was being in a country where the women are so underestimated. To work in the production area of a factory with a staff of more than a thousand people was a great challenge that changed me in a whole. At starting there were people under my command who did not respect my authority. Fortunately I could solve this issue talking to them. Finally I could achieve a stable work, with a harmonious environment.

I also feel proud of this experience because I helped many women who worked with me to gain esteem and value themselves more, even though their religion and traditions were such a big obstacles for them. They took me as an example to encourage them, a young woman that left her country to follow her dreams. Moreover, I can say happily that this experience inspired to me too. Furthemore, when I came back to Colombia I involved myself in a non-profit program helping disadvantaged women and children to learn basic skills, such as writing, reading, computer science and mathematics.

Right now I plan to pursue the master studies and after finishing I plan to apply to companies like Pwc or The Boston Consulting group, one of the best consulting groups to continue working in the consulting market and expand my career potential. At the same time I will start a foundation to continue helping women and children. I would like to make it clear though that I am not a feminist per say, I just matter-of-factly believe both genders have the right to have a fulfilling life.