Writing Feedback / should the government spend money on saving nearly extincted language ? [2]

According to the studying, about two third languages in the world are endangered. As it is becoming a burning topic to discuss, in my opinion, we should work out more and more protective actions toward nearly extincted language.

Not excepting any nations around the world, linguistics plays an important roll in culture. It can create a particular feature which separately different from and hardly to find in other countries. Virtually, written language translates culture through literature and poem, whereas, in oral language, culture is described lively by customs or songs. Linguistic can be influenced because of social, cultural, historical, and political factors. That is the reason why language should be conversed as the nation's sovereignty.

In historical aspect, linguistics can demonstrate the development of human and it is our ancestors' great achievements. Thanks to language, we can acknowledge how our forefathers lived in the past and learn a lot of precious lessons as well. For instance, Egyptian, which is the oldest language in the world, can reveal the way that people built such a huge architecture like the Terrifying One or Dynamic and other mysteries about embalming a corpse. Unfortunately, it was extinct by the 17th century and will take a number of years to be restored. Therefore, many riddles still have not been revealed.

In conclusion, linguistics is human's priceless fortunes; however, it has not been invested widely and deeply yet. Thus, I firmly support that preserving endangered language are not wasting at all and yet is needing more and more offers of people, especially, the young generation./.

Hello everyone, I am preparing for Ielts exam next year. I would be grateful if you can help me improve my writing skill.
I am looking forward to receiving your feedback soon. Thank you.

Writing Feedback / [ielts] Should we only be concerned with our own communities and countries? [3]

We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some previous years, assisting each other is not an activity aiming for personal benefits only. Among people around the world, this trend is growing positively. Especially, the field of action is widened from community into worldwide range.

When doing a charity, we should not distinguish between our nation and these others. The reasons for that are absolutely simple: we are of the same race even if we come from different nations and the important meaning of help lies in what you have given. Did you bring the poor what exactly they want? Did you really sympathize and feeling their hurts? And whether you do these work with your heart? Those are what you should concern about.

Moreover, helping each other is the lofty and beautiful behavior that can improve the relationship among nations all over the world. For instance, in 1970, Vietnamese army helped Cambodian subvert Pon Pot government, which is return the peace life toward Cambodia. Vietnamese do that without weighing the pros and the cons. Above all, they understand deeply the meaning of solidarity and friendship that they received. In the modern world, if one nation just tends to develop itself but pays attention in these others, it will be isolated and lose the friendships.

To summarize, helps should be done with our honest heart. We can start with assisting people around us and then broaden in some distance locations. Although, people have limited abilities, I ensure that with the enthusiasm and desire of helping each other there will not any barriers between us./.

I would be grateful if you can help me improve my writing skill.
I am looking forward to receiving your feedback soon. Thank you.
;)