Undergraduate / My oddly way I'd want to spend my free Saturdays - CommonApp extracurricular essay [4]

Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below. Limit 350 words

I am not finished with this. I simply reworked the start of the essay and was wondering how it works. Also, in what way should I take the end of this essay? Any ideas? Anything in here to risky or would shine a bad light on me? Thanks.

Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below. Limit 350 words
205/350 words

"​Armed verbal combat that aims to disprove logical fallacies may not be the average high school student's favorite extracurricular, but it sure is mine. Competing at a tournament from sunrise to sunset with intellectually intimidating teenagers in starched, collared shirts and over-sized suits is, oddly enough, the only way I'd want to spend my otherwise free Saturdays. While it is true that I cherish the gold placard smile that encompasses my face when I happen to win five straight preliminary rounds and lose none, something else, something more influential about debate is what truly gives it its place in my heart. Being a part of the debate team has rewarded me with much more than a few meretriciously shiny trophies.

In theory, debate is a simple concept: a discussion about a topic in which opposing viewpoints are set forth. In practice, high school debate is the most intricate, exuberant activity I've ever participated in -- and I'm also a cheerleader. This chaotic event has destroyed my naive innocence, but with destruction comes room for construction. My partiality toward systems of government quickly dissolved. No longer did I simply receive knowledge in my studies; I became the passionate skeptic I am today. Debate had recreated my mindset."

Undergraduate / "At the mere age of eleven, my Meryl Streep obsession flourished..." Why Vassar? [3]

Currently at 240/350 words... prompt is: How did you learn about Vassar and what aspect of our college do you find appealing?
Looking for advice on a final paragraph/how to end my essay? Feel free to give any other comments, aswell.
Spare nothing!

My addressing of the prompt How did you learn about Vassar and what aspect of our college do you find appealing? Limit 350 words
Currently 415 words... :( I know I can cut some stuff in the first paragraph, but am having trouble with exactly what to cut. Any other comments would be great, too, but please help with the length!!!

"At the mere age of eleven, my Meryl Streep obsession flourished. Every film starring her, every cameo appearance she made had to be in the watch of my eyes. Meryl possessed a certain sophistication that no other female figure I'd ever laid eyes on had. Eleven-year-old me could ramble off petty Meryl trivia without even blinking, and every Meryl rampage included fact number six: Meryl Streep graduated from Vassar College in 1971. Obviously, since Meryl had attended Vassar for its Drama program, I would, too.

Times have certainly changed since my preteen Meryl-obsessed self had figured out my life's plan. My interest in majoring in Drama has since been switched out for a major in the fascinating study of Economics. Countless hours spent watching and re-watching The Devil Wears Prada are now consumed by AP Calculus and AP Chemistry homework. But one aspect remains strong: my yearning to attend Vassar College.

My knowledge in regards to what Vassar has to offer has indefinitely skyrocketed to encompass more than simply being the alma mater of my most favorite human. I'm left wanting so much after watching one simple virtual tour of Vassar. I want to walk into the Main Building, bask in its incredulous Second Empire architecture, and experience the core of the educational perfection that is Vassar College. I want to delve into Political Science lectures and Philosophy seminars in the great Rockefeller Hall. I want to sit in the Thompson Memorial Library to spend a quiet afternoon reading with fresh sunlight pouring in the windows. And when my legs become stiff from sitting too long, I want to go for a stroll in the Library Lawn, taking in that fresh sunlight. It is truly astonishing to me that one random online click could make me feel like I belong somewhere so contently.

Digging deeper into Vassar only reveals an additional myriad of reasons as to why this college is my perfect fit. Not only is the college highly renowned in its economics program, Vassar's unique location makes studying economics there especially appealing. The college's close proximity to New York City is so beneficial for someone who wholeheartedly craves to work and reside in the City long term. In addition, the ability to study abroad in some of the most happening financial districts in the world, such as France, would seduce any connoisseur of economics. As Vassar's intellectual atmosphere seems nearly tailored toward me, I sincerely hope that one day my wants will become haves."

Undergraduate / As I matured I experienced increasing stress in combination with a lack of sleep. CommonApp [3]

Please leave any comments/concerns you think of while reading my essay. Thank you.

Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?
Word limit: 650

One scoop, two scoops, three heaping scoops of lavender-infused bath salts, strategically scattered throughout the piping water that fills the tub. One generous pump of vanilla-scented bath gel swirled to a frothing, foaming mixture. One foot, two feet into the scalding, steaming water filled basin. Legs, torso, chest all beginning to turn red from the intensity of the heat. Tingling in my toes and in my fingers. Now, I am content.

Before my adolescent discovery of the shower, the mere thought of boiling in my own broth would bring me to tears. I would have much rather kept the day's filth and grime on me than be forced to sit in the bathtub for a grueling half hour. The heat swirling atop the tub of water brought me to a state of lightheadedness and I nearly always fell asleep in the water. After waking to the sound of my own choking, my mother would recite her "you could have died" lecture, and I would be sent straight to bed. And so ended my bathing days.

As I matured I experienced increasing stress in combination with a lack of sleep. I'd realized that my showers weren't providing me with the intangible benefits my baths had. Though I didn't appreciate the nagging and punishments that would come from my actions in the bath, I did remember the hypnotic state baths induced. It was then that I had a small epiphany: my lack of sleep and resulting plunging state of wellbeing could be somewhat cured if I were to return to occasional bathing.

I have now come to terms with the state of lightheadedness I used to hate, and I truly appreciate its effects. The aroma of the lavender-vanilla liquid is almost intoxicating, causing a state of meditation to wash over me. Whether I have a classic novel in my hand or a mug of dark roast coffee on the tub's ledge doesn't matter. I could simply be reclining in the solid, molded porcelain of the comforting tub, memorizing the wavy texture of the ceiling. For the hour or two I'm soaking, I don't look into the future or relish the past. I've got my gaze fixed on the now, on how marvelous I feel at this very moment, in this very familiar tub. I never feel so content as when I'm in a hot bath.

A tranquilizing bath means escape. I allot myself this time to not only prune up my limbs, but to also forget. Bathing is my cure; I disregard whatever troubles were previously haunting me. While I tune out my own troubles, I focus on all there is to notice in my surroundings. I've met many a spider friend throughout my time in the tub who allow me to see the simplicity of life through their rudimentary actions. Maybe a hot bath won't cure some serious illness, I don't know. But I do know that when I am hurting, and when everyone else seems very far away, my bathtub is always there. I can only stand the stagnancy of paralyzed, stressed living for so long before I must bathe. Removing myself from the day's worries and placing myself into another world where I'm weightlessly floating feels rather purifying. A steaming bath is my holy water.

Word count: 546

Undergraduate / You're drinking Starbucks? Stereotypical ignorant white girl. It's probably not even actual coffee. [4]

Any comments would be appreciated! I don't think my ending sentence is strong enough to be remembered... any suggestions on that? Also, I purposefully used a rather subdue example of a stereotype as I didn't want the portrayal of the stereotype to be the stronghold of my essay, I just wanted it to help me get my point across. Do you think using this rather simple stereotype hurts me? Should I change it?

Stereotyped beliefs have the power to become self-fulfilling prophecies for behavior. 300 words

"Oh, you're drinking Starbucks? Stereotypical ignorant white girl. It's probably not even actual coffee," a stranger spat at me at the sight of the signature white-and-green cup clutched in my hand. This preconceived notion of my personality based simply off an object in my hand only contributed to my fleeting teenage lack of self-confidence. Not only was my piping hot cup indeed filled with dark roast coffee, extra bold, no cream and no sugar, but I was in no sense ignorant. I'd actually gone to get this very coffee to give me a boost in my academic studying.

Stereotypes reflect a certain innate human tendency to group certain people based on extraneous characteristics. In an attempt by humans to neatly organize their world into acceptable and unacceptable, complex individual variance is neglected. Faced with a stereotype, there are two perceived courses of action: compliance with the stereotype so as to feel comfort and solace, or defiance against the stereotype to feel unique and distinct. These actions both hold the power for the stereotype to induce a self-fulfilling prophesied behavior as both actions are dependent on what the stereotype itself says.

The effects of stereotypes are merely negative. They destroy an individual's specific set of characteristics and replace them with inaccurate beliefs conceived by others. They force an individual to either comply with the set guidelines of their given circumstances to fit in or defy who they truly are to stand out. But there is a third course of action one can ensue when faced with a stereotype, one which I ensue: to act on one's own accord regardless of the stereotypes placed on their characteristics. And that's why I drink my delectable Starbucks dark roast extra bold with no mind for anyone who attributes facts about me to it.

299 words