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Posts by imlost88
Name: hailung
Joined: Mar 28, 2017
Last Post: Apr 4, 2017
Threads: 2
Posts: 3  

Displayed posts: 5
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imlost88   
Apr 4, 2017
Writing Feedback / The cities are becoming busier, the traffic jams are more often.. [2]

Traffic congestion is becoming a huge problem for many major cities. Suggest some measure that could be taken to reduce traffic in big cities.

Please give me some comments on my work and the band score I may achieve. Thanks a lot.

review and solution to the traffic problem



Nowadays, it is obvious that traffic jam is a regular occurrence as cities are becoming busier. In my opinion, this global issue can be tackled by improving public transport system and imposing higher tax on cars' price.

Firstly, current public transportation has been failed to address the demands of cities' dwellers. When the city infrastructure was not designed to handle such excessive traffic, a better transport system would discourage people from riding their own vehicles. A complete reform in bus system, like introducing new buses with better services, comfortable seats, punctuality, bus schedule applications and opening new routes that connect outlying areas with the city center, will be a turning point in people prejudices against buses in general and therefore, attract more commuters to use public transportation. In addition, building metro system, that is capable of carrying greater number of passengers, will definitely reduce traffic burden on the roads. For example, the majority of Singaporeans are taking bus and MRT to work instead of driving cars.

Another solution to the traffic problem is to increase car cost. Higher tax on car increases car price makes cars so expensive to acquire that people abandon them for other means of transport. For example, special consumption tax to go into effect in Vietnam has doubled or tripled cars' original value, making Vietnam among the highest prices for automobile globally. As a result, people are more likely to use taxi or Grab car for business or short-distance travel. In other words, cars will decline greatly in number, which allow traffic to move more easily, thus reduce pressure on traffic on narrow streets as well as in the inner city.

To conclude, the measures mentioned above will play key role in alleviating traffic congestion and its aggravating effects on the cities' residents.
imlost88   
Apr 1, 2017
Writing Feedback / Information Technology brings a work flexibility [6]

Furthermore, some jobs ... That is why they ... This is because the artist ...

You can combine those three sentences into one with a comma to separate each idea or make it into two sentences to avoid such repetition: That is / This is

And sentence 3 can be example for sentence 1
imlost88   
Mar 30, 2017
Writing Feedback / Great role of big sporting competitions in our world [4]

@Holt

Thank you very much. I appreciate your kind response.

Anyway, if I correct all errors that you've mentioned, what band score can I achieve

And one more thing, could you give me your evaluation after I correct my essay again

Thank you
imlost88   
Mar 29, 2017
Writing Feedback / Great role of big sporting competitions in our world [4]

Popular events like the football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

great role of big sporting competitions



Some sports' advocates believe that popular events like World Cup is crucial means in conciliating conflicts between nations and liberating patriotic pride. I disagree with this view and believe that the role of these sporting occasions is overrated.

Firstly, a single sport tournament could not help alleviate international prolonged disputes. The event, which is held periodically, can sure captivate civilians' attention and enable them to forget the grief they are suffering to join in a celebration of sorts, for a few seconds. However, the majority of the time they have to spend on dealing with serious wars' consequences . Solider and civilian causalities, violation of human rights, infrastructure destruction, crime, illiteracy among other mental health issues from the trauma of the wars would definitely take up a significant amount of time to recover and rebuild. From ancient to recent time, it is ambiguous that sports can bring people together and pave a path to peace. The Romans and Greeks would interrupt battle to participate in the games, but for a fixed time only. While the U.S. national team played Cuba for the first time was due more to FIFA requirements than any diplomatic efforts on the part of either country.

Interestingly, there is a firm correlation between strong feelings of patriotism and the likelihood of war. In fact, people who are patriotic have a greater sense of belonging to a particular nation or what is so-called "national identity." The concept of placing their own country over another in terms of religious differences, political policies or economic envy can encourage violence against the neighboring countries. El Salvado beat Honduras in a World Cup qualifying match which later ignited longstanding elevating tension between the two countries into a brief war is a vivid example of a legacy of pain and pride between the two. The promising outlook that Irag can host its first national soccer team home game takes nothing for granted to the principles of sports which promote cultural plurality and togetherness. In contrast, a deep-rooted destructive relationship after the U.S. evasion of Irag would trigger a revenge massacre for the killing of approximately 500,000 Iraqis.

In conclusion, sports' power to heal is stronger than hatred power to destroy has been mirages. The termination of war demands more than sole sporting diplomacy.
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