Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by lamphuongta
Name: Anatasia
Joined: Oct 9, 2017
Last Post: Oct 11, 2017
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
Likes: 1
From: Viet Nam
School: Bangtansonyeondan

Displayed posts: 4
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
lamphuongta   
Oct 11, 2017
Writing Feedback / The invention of the Internet has had negative effects on your civilization. [4]

First, there're some grammatical and spelling errors
- "acquire the knowledge of cooking from with others"
- " take a huge amount of time"
- "topic about current events from the news" - 'The' would be used either for the media, or for specific news, I guess
- "After the arrival appearance of the Internet"
- " I play games on weekends because they are it's fun"

Your essay, generally, quiet good. However, you must find more evidence because in an essay, every point you make must be backed up with supporting evidence. I wish you would get a high grade for your TOELF writing.
lamphuongta   
Oct 10, 2017
Writing Feedback / Parent should not pressure their children to choose particular profession. [7]

- "Children must not be forced by their parents"
- " I strongly agree that children should not be pressured and free to decide the path they desire.."
- " The kind of attitude puts a lot of ..."
- " For instance, when a parents are both ..." - a parents ?

There are some grammatical errors need to be fix, but your essay, in general, is pretty good. Good luck ♡
lamphuongta   
Oct 10, 2017
Writing Feedback / Contrast high schools and universities - Contrast Essay [6]

There are some grammatical and spelling errors . I think you mean "futher" is "further" or "shools" is "schools" but you typed too fast to check it again. However, your essay, in general, is pretty good.
lamphuongta   
Oct 9, 2017
Writing Feedback / Television is one of the most wonderful inventions of human. And how it influence our children? [2]

Watching television is waste of time. Do you agree with this? Why?

less tv, more activities for kids



Television is one of the most wonderful inventions of human. We can learn a lot from a television. However, new surveys suggest that the TV we use to make our life easier are killing our leisure time. Therefore, some people say watching TV is waste of time for children because of many reasons.

Firstly, they become highly addicted to watching TV which leads to lots of health problems such as headache, backache, and falling eye sights. They are working shorter hours, taking fewer activities. They may easily get access to the harmful things on TV like people usually do on horror or action or violent films. It is dangerous for children . As a result, the productivity and efficiency im work or study of kids who usually watch TV are not high. Thus, children will have poor concentration on their work or study and often distract their duties.

Secondly, it cannot help children get more living skills because they are always sitting in front of the television and do not do anything. Consequently, they do not go outside, they will not have many chances to expose their feelings or presenting their ideas in public. Some skills such as team spirit, creativity, problem solving, cognitive, and social skills are not gained. For example, instead sitting in front of the TV, what about going outside and make friend or go for a walk with the family,.. The problem is that children do not have wisdom to discriminate between what is good or bad for them. They can compromise their sleeping hours to watch their favourite shows or films. They can also neglect their household chores or homework..

However, in fact, some people say television has both drawbacks and advantages. Children can watch some channels to know more the present affairs of the world. They can learn more lessons in a fun way by watching special shows for children. TV is very important for human. Everything contains good side and bad side, and the television has no exception. Children should spend little time watching TV and take part in more activities.

In summary, although it has many drawbacks, we try our best to reduce them and make it better for children.

---- Anatasia aka @lamphuongta -----
Can somebody check this essay for me please ; 3 ; ? Thanks.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳