Writing Feedback / Should women have the right to join the army? Their motherhood role may be affected. IELTS question [2]

In some countries people think women should have equality with men, in particular equal rights to work as police officers or serve in the Army. Others think women are not suitable for such jobs.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Women in the military

The dispute over gender equality has not be settled yet. It is argued by some that women should have the same right as men in order to work as military or police officers. However, others believe women are not fit for these jobs. As far as I am concerned, I advocate the latter viewpoint.

With regard to equality, some people, especially those in western societies, deem it unacceptable and unfair to limit individual's career options in the name of gender. They believe if women are not allowed to hold jobs in police and military services, their career opportunities will become limited, which is against the values of modern societies, based on which everyone should has the same chance of success. From social aspect, there would also be some negative impacts as result of the limitation. In fact, it negatively affects young female's mentality when they think about their career options. In other words, the restriction in their career choices adversely affects their mindset as they might assume they would face other form of discrimination elsewhere. Consequently, they may not put as much as effort into climbing career ladders even in other professions.

On the other hand, there are more compelling reasons why women are not considered suitable for these formidable tasks. Firstly, it is scientifically proven that women's physiology is not fit for the physically demanding duties of police or military officers. For example, in combat ground, officers are expected to run fast, fight with criminals in which men are more well-suited. In addition, because women shoulder the very crucial responsibility of motherhood, working as a militant or police officer make it hard for them to strike a balance between their duties and parenthood. To explain it, there would be some occasions on which they are required to be away from their homes and their children for months in order to carry out missions. Consequently, as women are emotionally attached to their children, not only does it undermine the effectiveness of their missions, but also would lead to poor upbringing practices.

In conclusion, although it will be more civilized if women are allowed to work in these fields, I believe women should not take these jobs as it negatively affects the very important role of motherhood.

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2, Are celerities setting bad role models for the young because of their glamour? [3]

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

a bad example for youngsters?

Given the fact that today's movie stars, notable musicians and singers are more well-known for their lavish lifestyles and material possessions, some people are of the opinion that this is adversely affecting the young's perception of the world around them by setting unacceptable role models.

Personally, I agree with this viewpoint for several reasons. Firstly, I think because young people lack knowledge and experience, they are highly vulnerable to be influenced by these so-called role models. The youth tend to imitate their lifestyles regardless of their own financial situations or personal styles. The young tend to have a desire to possess what these famous stars have. As a result, they put a lot of pressure not only on themselves but also on their parents as they aspire to the lifestyles of their favourite stars. In extreme cases, some even resort to committing crimes like theft to achieve what they want overnight, where it would not otherwise be attainable.

Furthermore, this unrealistic expectation among the youth forces them to pressure their peers to think and feel the same way and try to look up to celebrities as well. This results in some youth who may personally oppose the vain lifestyles to also conform and give in. These youth often end up having no other option but to follow the trend to avoid ridicule or being ostracized by their friends. According to a study that was conducted in Japan on behavioral patterns of more than 2000 teenagers, they found that the number of teens who followed celebrities' way of life, solely because of peer pressure was alarming. The study looked at the effects of glamorous lifestyles of celebrities, and found that 26% of teenage boys and girls imitate celebrities only to satisfy their friend's requests.

In conclusion, I believe that celebrities' lifestyles is of great importance to the youth and it impacts their culture a lot. If the youth don't follow the popular trend, they run the risk of being excluded from their peers which can be a big problem for them.