Writing Feedback / Is it feasible for a country provide university places for a high proportion of people? [2]

many people pursuing diplomas

Hi all, l am praticing writing essays in hope of sharpening my writing skill and achieving in high band in IELTS
l hope l would receive feedbacks and commnets from you all
thank you so much !

Many people hold the view that allowing a large proportion of young people to pursue higher education is not practical and useful . From my perspective, I completely agree with this view

There are many reasons why university places for too many students would not be possible. To begin with, if we allowed this hypothesis happened ,there would be an dramatic increase in the number of university students, which means that the university will likely be overloaded for lack of space and facilities and therefore put a great pressure on the state universities. Furthermore ,the support from the governments is an indispensible part for they need to allocate funds to build more many schools and colleges .This is impossible since there are many more other considerable sectors they need to take priority over construction of universities.

I would also argue that even if this aim can be achieved, it would not generate any benefit. Offering many more university places will definitely result in entrance standards set to enter university lowered. As a result, teaching and studying quality is decreased and thereby generating low-qualified graduates. Another consequence worth mentioning is that a large number of graduates possessing the same educational attainments will make it challenging for employers when recruiting suitable candidates for vacant job positions; and one more negative result possibly predicted is this will lead to imbalance in workforce due to the lack of blue collar works working in manual works or factories

In conclusion, ,I completely agree with the belief that increasing the number of places available in universities is not possible and this is useful in the society for the reasons mentioned above.

Writing Feedback / The controversial idea to give longer prison sentences in order to reduce crime rate [2]

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l am preparing for Ielts and this is my essay ,l hope l would receive comments and feedback from you all ,thank you so much !

jail time as a solution for crime

People have different views that whether imprisoning people longer in jails in a longer time or implementing other alternative ways is better to reduce crime rates. In my opinion, there are many measures that can be taken to mitigate this controversial issue.

On the one hand, prison will definitely an effective way to reduce crimes since it would act as a deterrent to people who have intention of committing crimes. To begin with, it may prevent wrongdoers from harming other citizens .This is understandable as during the time they are imprisoned, they are totally being isolated from society, likely being imprisoned in a remote area. Moreover ,they are highly suffering from torturing physical punishments every single days for their previous evil actions and therefore minimize the likelihood of re-offending actions .Another effect worth mentioning is their awareness is raised significantly through the moral lessons and meaningful activities taught in the jails

On the other hand, apart from using jails as punishments we have many other anti-measures to solve it. One of them is non-custodial sentence, a punishment which is not done in prison ,such as fines ,probation orders or community orders service orders .By doing this the authority give them the chance to discern their wrong actions and raise their awareness of not committing a crime. Furthermore, the government plays an important role to tackle the issue. This could be done by installing surveillance cameras in places with lots of criminal activities. One more potential approach is that famous people like movie stars should set a good example for young people to follow, which will eventually lead to decrease in juvenile delinquency.

In conclusion, despite the undeniable effectiveness of prisons, there are many other appropriate solutions can be adopted to ease such problems