Writing Feedback / Comment on this ielts writing task 1: The proportion of urban population in four Asian nations [2]

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart illustrates the proportion of urban population in four Asian nations between 1970 and 2020, with predictions to 2030 and 2040.
Overall, it is evident that all countries generally witnessed an upward trend in the percentage of people living in the cities over the 50-year period. Moreover, it can be seen that Malaysia experienced the highest figure, and all those trends will continue until 2040.

In 1970, the figures for Philippines and Malaysia were by far the highest, at around 30%, compared to that of Thailand and Indonesia, which was only 18% and 15%, respectively. After 30 years, while the percentage of urban residents in Philippines increased to around 50% and saw a decline in 2000, that of Malaysia went up to about 48%. Meanwhile, Thailand urban populations rose to 30% in 1990 and remained stable during the 20s. In contrast, populations living in cities in Indonesia climbed to 30% and surpassed the figure for Philippines in 2010.

By 2030, it is predicted that the percentage of urban populations in Malaysia surge to 80% and will become the nation which has the highest figure in 2040. Likewise, that of Indonesia is expected to see a growth to around 60% in 2040, whereas urban populations in Philippines and Thailand will stand at 55% and 50% in turn.

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Writing Feedback / Evaluate my ielts writing task 2 essay about health and diet topic [3]

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In the modern life, many countries have reported a large number of people contracting diseases relating to eating too much fast food. This problem leads to controversial opinions whether taxes be imposed on this kind of food or not. Personally, I partially agree with this point of views.

On the one hand, taxing unhealthy food brings several benefits to the health of the citizens. If the price of junk food increase dramatically, people will be deterred from consuming it and will instead prepare food at home or have other healthier choices . Moreover, the expenditure on this kind of food can be later used by government and local councils to allocate funds to the maintenance of fitness facilities as well as the construction of the new ones. In other words, imposing taxes on unhealthy food will cultivate a life - time habit of refraining from junk food and people will also become more interested in engaging in physical activities because of invested health infrastructure.

On the other hand, eating junk food is not the only cause leading to healthy problems. Firstly, many people are in habit of practicing sedetary lifestyle and rarely do exercises. In addition, the knowledge related to food and nutrition is blissfully ignored by a considerable number of people. As a result, these people run a high risk of contracting serious diseases and obessity. Futhermore, the pressure of the modern life also discourage people from leading a healthy lifestyle as they tend to choose unhealthy food for the sake of time - saving due to the overloaded amount of work and lack of time to take care of themselves. Besides, if the government impose a higher taxation schemes on junk food, there will be a decline in the middle and lower income families' consumption of this type of food, while the affluent consumers are not significantly affected. This means that the tax schemes are only effective with specific groups of people.

In conclusion, while imposing taxes can bring some obvious advantages to our health, I believe that there are also some factors that contribute to health problems as well as this action can cause a problem related to the socal classes.