Undergraduate / St. Olaf College Essay-your self-designed course [2]

Could you please go over my essay and help me on the grammar.
Thanks in advance for any helpful suggestions and feedback.

During Interim, students pursue a single course, often of an interdisciplinary nature. If you could design your own Interim course today, what would it be? What areas of knowledge would you combine? (250-500) (The Interim in St. Olaf is a four-week period of intensive study in one area. Interim provides an opportunity to focus students' entire attention on one course for a full month, to offer a time of study in depth.)

If I could design my own interim course, it would be the Industrial Park Course, a course that explores different aspects of industrial park from different perspectives. To have a more profound understanding of the topic, I would combine areas of management, geography, sociology and environmental science together.

Industrial parks always accompany me since I was young. My family is near a small industrial park in a small town; my high school is a stone's throw from a famous industrial park, China-Singapore Suzhou Industrial Park (SIP). From my unique experience with these industrial regions, I find that diverse industrial areas differ greatly from management levels and work efficiencies. Thus, the course needs to be combined with geography and management to help me understand how the development zones function and what to do to make them run more smoothly and efficiently.

I would also approach the course from a sociological perspective. As a product of human beings' wisdom, industrial parks cannot be separated from the society. When considering various matters about industrial parks, we need to put them into a context of the whole society and to take human beings into consideration. How do industrial parks promote local economies? Why those parks change people's lifestyle so much? What role do they play to social stratification? The questions could be addressed by the course with the help of sociology.

Another field that should be integrated into the course is environmental science. Nowadays, sustainability has raised serious concerns internationally due to the deteriorating environmental conditions around the world. Terms like "low-carbon" and "energy-saving" have become popular among people. Thus, the Industrial Park Course will undoubtedly involve areas of environmental sciences since industrial parks are traditional and big pollutant sources. By learning knowledge of environmental science, I would know industry's impact on human health and well being and on the whole biosphere. I believe the four areas of knowledge will make my self-designed course effective and attractive. I cannot help to carry them out if possible.

Undergraduate / Wheaton College(MA) Essay-Why are you interested in Wheaton [3]

I am wondering whether this essay is a strong enough "why essay". Please help me with it. Any help, including grammat correction is greatly appreciated.

Please tell us why you are interested in Wheaton（no more than 1000 characters）

Connections program in Wheaton College interests me. I realized that no course or subject is isolated after exploring various areas of knowledge. Through a variety of fields in science, I can feel the influence of art, from the beauty of DNA double helix structure to the harmony of the periodic table; in the domain of art, I can embrace the logic of the Adventures of Sherlock Holmes and appreciate the golden ratio of Mona Lisa...Exploring topics and problems from different approaches has become one of my habits. Thus, I hope to find this distinctive way of learning in the college and Wheaton College is a perfect match for me. Wheaton put great emphasis on interdisciplinary work, even allowing students to discover their own linked courses. The program alone has made me excited about Wheaton. It is easy to imagine how Wheaton will help me work out my potential through learning, reflecting and growing.

Scholarship / "the weights" - Bard College DSS Scholarship [NEW]

Prompt: Write about a stimulating and enjoyable experience you have had in science, mathematics, or computing. This might be a course you took, an experiment you performed, a book or article you read, a program you attended, a theorem you proved, or a problem you solved.

10 pounds, 20, 30...the weights were added one after another. My heart stood still as I watched the bridge slowly deformed. People in the room held the breath like me. About to broke, the bridge designed by our team changed the shape greatly...

In my middle school, there was a bridge design program (model contest) every year. The program was unique because its judgment criterion was not bridges' aesthetic level but the carrying ability. Every team had one week to design the works before the presentation time. Using either wood or bamboo, the bridge that could bear the most weight would win no matter how ugly it looked. As an enthusiast of science, I took part in the program with two other science lovers as a team. We gathered together to talk about the design. As we tried to figure out whether to buy wood or bamboo, a new idea suddenly struck me. Why not stop buying the material from markets as most other participants did. Why not use the stuff from Mother Nature. There was a bamboo grove near my grandma's house in the village. The bamboo there was very hard that I could use it to make the "heavy machine gun" in my childhood. Soon, I took the action with the help of my grandmother.

Having collected the ideal material, we began our construction. The procedure was relatively easy to handle since we had obtained much knowledge of mechanics and bridge before. Everything went smoothly until the day before the presentation, when we almost finished our "masterpiece". As I examined and checked the finished product, I spotted a small crack bared by the bamboo, which soon brought me into a dilemma. "What should I do?"If I replaced the flawed bamboo with the intact one, the whole bridge had to be rebuilt, which will be very troublesome; if I did not, the defect might affect the performance of the bridge even though the influence was trivial. Finally, I decided to get new bamboo despite the efforts because every detail in science, as I perceive it, counts.

The bridge collapsed when the load finally reached six three pounds. I was very surprised when finding that the bridge coming second only hold two pounds less than our bridge. Thanks to our right choice and remaking, if we took the original bridge to the presentation, it was hard to tell whose bridge would lead.