Undergraduate / NYU movie and poem and Lehigh community and equity [4]

Here are part of the supplements for NYU and Lehigh. Any kind of feed back would be great, especially for the poem and movie- are they too vague/should i just completely start over?

1. In our ever-changing society, people have defined 'equity' and 'community' in many different ways. How do you define these terms and what are the implications of equity and community for our 21st century society?

Equity and community are like two magnets of opposite charges, both attracted to each other. A community, a group people joined together by a certain trait, work together to reach a greater good for the people involved. Many times, this greater good is equity, or fairness. Without equity, there would be no community since the people would not have a goal to work towards. When I think of community, I see all as equal since all are joined by similarities. Thus, equity must exist to form communities.

Today, equity and community are still too far apart for the attraction to fully connect. Yet, each day communities work towards bringing themselves closer to their counterpart and goal, to make the world a better place where no one has to worry about the consequences of being the "minority." Hopefully one day soon these ends will meet, repelling the negativity that is still in place today and make a more positive world.

2. Write a haiku, limerick, or short (eight lines or less) poem that best represents you.
Swirls of blue and grey haze
fade away
Eyes now wide, she is engulphed in red
As it runs through her veins, her soul
she turns her nighttime hazes into clear stone

or maybe

She is-
like a tiger
chasing her prey to feed her never ceasing hunger
like a bud
roots in the ground, still blossoming into an everlasting sequoia
like a mantle clock
small in stature, immensely intricate inside

-I don't know if either are personal enough.

3. In the year 2050, a movie is being made of your life. Please tell us the name of your movie and briefly summarize the story line.

I don't have a title yet, but-
" " is a suspense/drama of the life of Elizabeth Mohammed, renowned scientist. After graduating from NYU, she leads a happy life, marrying her lovely husband and working for a large research company; working on a cure for debilitating diseases. One day while taking photographs for a charity auction, she captures a man dumping a large trash bag into the river. Knowing something is not right, Elizabeth heads home as the suspecting man glares at her. The next day she finds her lab trashed- all traces of her research in ruin, her camera gone. Can she find the killer and start from scratch to rebuild her life's work and find a cure?

It's only a rough idea, but already over the 500 character limit. Any way to shorten it? Should I leave the rest a question, or should I give more away?

Thanks so much for reading this, sorry it's a little long!

Undergraduate / Common App Essay- Trying to be different but need advice on it [2]

I guess this follows the prompt " A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community," even though it's more of my own topic.

I feel like it doesn't flow too well and that something is missing to make it good. Any criticism or advice on it overall? I can fix grammar and all that later. Thanks.

In the past, it was hard for me to fall asleep most nights. Most of the time I'd be up until early hours thinking. Thinking about school, work, friends, the past, and usually what the future has in store for me. I'm still not entirely sure how I want my future to turn out. Will I ever decide a path? I have too many interests. These thoughts trouble me, so I look around my room with heavy eyes, focusing on anything in proximity of the light my laptop gives off to give my mind something calming to think about.

Tonight my tactic does not work. My laptop is placed on top of my backpack, which reminds me of my Latin IV Honors test tomorrow. I know that I will never be completely ready for it, or really any test. Sure, I do great on vocabulary quizzes and other assignments, but no matter how hard I work it is almost impossible for me to receive an A on a test. When I transferred I was given a choice: stay in the original Latin II class, or skip two courses and take Latin IV H. The less advanced of the courses would be like "going back to kindergarten for me," as my new teacher explained, but she did not have a Latin III that semester. I'm not a very sporadic person; I need to evaluate my options I have before I commit, or else I probably would have taken the easy way out. Yet, I wanted to make sure my choice would be the right one, and I honestly think it was. I felt I would enjoy learning so much about the great Classical language and culture- it is one of my favorite subjects- and would like the challenge- that is what taking a language is for. Even though I will never succeed on tests that have a large reading comprehension section where I do not know half the words in it, I still succeed, holding a B in the class.

Making the best out of a situation is what I always try to do. Since I could not take the correct Latin course, so I took one that I would learn what I would have and more. It is a challenge, but I am overcoming it. I own more than 40 items of makeup; not including the individual colors in my eye shadow palettes. This might make me sound like a materialistic person, but I am not. I have so much makeup because I do not have much artistic talent- I cannot draw or write poetry. But I can apply makeup well, so I use that as a creative outlet- coloring my eyes instead of paper. I tried taking guitar lessons, but even after a year I still could not quite get it-so I play Guitar Hero instead of getting upset about it. I cannot try out different careers and pick the one I like, so I join clubs or programs to help narrow my. By participating in Mock Trial I have realized I do not want to be a lawyer- yet I still do it because I learn much more than law from it. I cannot sing well, so I make my flute and violin resonate instead. There are endless possibilities to how people can prosper and be happy without always wanting something they do not have.

I realize it might take me a little longer than others to make decisions involving my future, but I would not call myself indecisive- I just need to ensure I am making the correct choice for myself by learning the most I can and analyzing my options. I wish picking my future path was easier and less stressful, but it is not. Yet, after much contemplation that has taken away from my precious hours of sleep (could that be why I am only 4'10"?), I feel I have finally found some peace of mind. So far, I can overcome my obstacles if I try, whether it be a tough decision or a talent I do not have, I always try to do my best and choose what I know will help me later on, even if it is difficult. I know I should force what I cannot do well or do not full heartedly like upon myself- I need to do what I prosper in and love and I feel that will point me in the right direction. I need to use the talents I have to their full extent. If I keep living by these lessons, I know my future will be a happy one, and lately I have been sleeping a few hours more every night