I have no clue who I am. Should be changed to (I don't have a clue who I am )
I am not sure what the last sentence in the first paragraph means. You don't have a favorite book? or you don't like to read? I would explain that a little more clearly.
Overall it is a good essay, I like the little humor you have included.
I am not sure I agree. I think this is an experience that did challenge your beliefs. Drugs and peer pressure is a huge problem in America. It shouldn't be a taboo topic.
good luck, and good for you for standing up for beliefs.
Thank you, that does help. What do you think of the essay? do you think this would be a good personal statement? I was hoping to convay that I am outgoing and motivated. I love challenges and am not afraid to work hard, do you think that came across in this essay?
Hello, I was hoping someone could help me with my personal statement. The requirements are that it be around 500 words or less.
Here it goes
I believe there are many facets that shape your life. For instance the people you are exposed to, challenges you experience or roadblocks you may have to overcome, all have an effect on who you are. While I have had many challenges and roadblocks there is one particular event that has made a great impact on my life. It was the summer of my sophmore year; my dad took me on a hike. Not just any hike, but we...
(this is approximately 510 words)
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