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Posts by TheScholar
Joined: Dec 28, 2010
Last Post: Dec 29, 2010
Threads: 2
Posts: 3  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 5
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TheScholar   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / Study Abroad options + Changing the world - UPenn supplement [NEW]

Answer the essay on a separate sheet of paper. Your essay should be one page in length (approximately 500 words).

Considering both the specific undergraduate school or program to which you are applying and the broader University of Pennsylvania community, what academic, research, and/or extracurricular paths do you see yourself exploring at Penn?


Everyone can change the world. Sadly, most people either lack the willpower or are not given the opportunities to do so. With its world renowned research, stellar academics, and committed student body, the University of Pennsylvania has a variety of resources to lend its students. If given the chance to attend, I would bring my devotion to learn to the University of Pennsylvania. I believe that UPenn can help me change the world, one novel at a time.

At times of great stress, I have found much comfort in reading, discussing, and writing literature. Because of this deep love of the written word, I see myself as an editor at a publishing company. I find the idea of discovering a newly written manuscript, devouring its story and deeper meanings with my eyes, delightful. This dedication to literature that I posses is what especially interests me in UPenn.

There are a plethora of academic pathways I could follow in UPenn's College of Arts and Sciences. I could major in English, double major in Psychology or Communication, and minor in Journalistic Writing, Creative Writing, or Comparative Literature. I could assist one of the many notable professors in their leading research and apply for a research grant later in my college career. I could use the knowledge gained in my UPenn classes and summer internships to succeed, giving myself the edge needed to prosper in my future graduate years and, later, the business world.

UPenn's proximity to the vibrant city of Philadelphia brings another layer of possibilities. Not only does Philadelphia provide a culturally enriching college experience, it also gives UPenn students the chance to intern at important organizations, such as "Rare Books and Archives," which I would be particularly interested in.

Chances for students to connect with a diverse group of students and explore alternate interests are surround students. For instance, I would be very interested in getting involved with any one of the Greek Society's nine sororities. Because I would be an English major, I would also try to join Sigma Tau Delta, the International English Honor Society. I have always been an avid vocal musician, and I am sure that participating in an a cappella group would become a large part of my extracurricular life at UPenn.

The University of Pennsylvania's numerous Study Abroad options would give me the chance to enrich my college education while also giving back to the world around me. For example, the English department's program in London allows students to study for either a semester or a year at any of three institutions: Goldsmiths, Queen Mary, or King's College London. Having the ability to learn in a foreign country provides students with an exciting and culturally diverse learning environment while also giving students the freedom to share their knowledge with those around them. With UPenn's Study Abroad program, I would try to visit France for a summer. My four years of French language study would allow me a chance to practice the language and study French literature at a more intense level.

The University of Pennsylvania not only gives students an exemplary education, it also gives students the means to give this education to others.
TheScholar   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / "introduced to the world of business" - Carnegie Mellon "Why CMU" essay [4]

Great essay! I just have a couple of ideas.

As many people from Western countries perceive that Chinese are very sensitive to numbers, I'm not an exception either.

Your opening sentence should hook the reader! Try rewording it, "Many people from Western countries perceive that the Chinese are very sensitive to numbers. I am no exception." Or you might just want to try a different one!

I agree with Perplexity215. You need to vary your sentence length! With the readers going through so many essays, a little variety will keep them interested in your essay.

Great last sentence! I feel like you are already a student at CMU!
TheScholar   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / My political views didn't align with those of my classmates;Let your life speak TUFTS [4]

Overall this is a great mini-essay! Just a few comments.

I joined my school's Speech and Debate team, (a little known fact about Texas, there is a fiercely competitive Debate circuit), and threw myself into the activity, enjoying statewide success.

Either go with the commas or the parenthesis. You don't need both. :)

My entire senior year I spent in New Delhi, India which influenced me tremendously.

Maybe try wording this differently. Such as, "My senior year was spent in New Delhi, India, which has influenced (my outlook on life?) me tremendously.

Great job!
TheScholar   
Dec 28, 2010
Undergraduate / "Sydney, just give her a chance." -Brown: What is the best piece of advice [3]

It's your first day of first grade at a new school. Your mom and dad are waiting with you at the bus stop. You tell them of your worries: that you'll be picked on, that you'll make no friends, that you'll have a mean teacher. And how do your parents respond? They undoubtedly deliver the iconic phrase, "Just be yourself." At the time, you question your parents' sanity, slowly muster the courage to climb the bus's stairs, and soon arrive at school to live out one of the most uncomfortable days of your life.

This is the earliest memory I have of being told to "be myself." That day I was paraded in front of the class by my teacher and sat at a desk near the back of the room. I remember walking out to recess, alone, and spending the majority of my time trying to avoid all human contact in fear of being harassed. But that wasn't how I acted at my old school. I was the kid who befriended everyone. I vowed that I would never again spend a recess in hiding.

The next day, at the first recess, I stuck by my decision. Walking out onto the playground, I braced myself for any awkwardness that may ensue. I searched the courtyard for my future best friend. I knew that I would find a friend that day. Like my parents said, I just had to be myself. After a bit of looking about, I found a girl sitting on a bench, watching the other kids swing and play. She didn't look sad, just curious. I, a bit overenthusiastically, ran over to the bench and scooted myself next to her. I introduced myself, and she did not respond. Thinking she hadn't heard me, I repeated myself. When I had finished, I heard the softest response. Her name was Sydney, she said.

After a year of convincing, by following her around everywhere, Sydney finally gave up trying to avoid me, and we've been friends ever since. In recent years, I've learned of the advice Sydney's parents gave her to handle my "openness." After a couple weeks of her complaining to her parents, they gave her the advice that was the "key" to my parents' advice: "Sydney, just give her a chance." She did.

Of course, this advice could have led to the most awkward social attempt in my life. Being true to myself wasn't easy then, and it still isn't now. However difficult it may be, this advice will always be the best I've been given. Not only did being myself give me my closest and best friend, it also gave me a way of living my life.
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