Undergraduate / "hope is itself our life" - Cristo has had a significant influence on me [5]

I also feel as though you should write more you always want to go above and beyond. What situation have you been in where you feel like you had to fight for your life no matter what ? elaborate more on that. Put more of you into the essay because the college is looking for how it has effected you and how you deal with your problems. I hope this helps I my self am doin an essay and i am putting up my final draft I would apprecate it if you would take the time out to look over my admissions essay as well today is its deadline. thanks and good luck to all of us

Writing Feedback / TOEFL SPEAKING-The most embarrassing moment for me [5]

I think you should start off with accident and what was going on at that moment then as your conclusion say this the most embarssing moment for you. I hope this helps I am about to put my final draft up for my admission essay i would appreciate if you would look over it again. thanks for all your help