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Posts by furya21
Joined: Jul 12, 2011
Last Post: Aug 23, 2011
Threads: 1
Posts: 4  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 5
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furya21   
Jul 25, 2011
Undergraduate / "To get my Bachelor's Degree in Digital Media" - Why UCF? [5]

Thanks kevin for all your advice but I'm having trouble understanding your last bit at the end. I think I understand; that i should convince the reader that i have some brilliant plan or something but i don't really know how i can do that..

other than that you helped me alot!
furya21   
Jul 24, 2011
Essays / what to write an essay about "Hope" [4]

Be sure to give examples of hope in each situation. Might I suggest the recent Norway bombings as an example?
furya21   
Jul 23, 2011
Writing Feedback / Ielts: (career / life experience) - Why do people go to university or college? [5]

In conclusion, people go to college for two primary reasons, including career preparation and life experience. Knowledge accumulation and skills improvement offer people more opportunities to get a good job while becoming a student with an independent life brings people unforgettable experiences. I think attending college plays an important part in the life of many people

- The red is the most important part of that paragraph. The first part of that ending paragraph is just restating what you said in the beginning.

- Never write anything like "I think.."

This would make a better and stronger conclusion.
"Attending college plays an important part in the life of many people.Knowledge accumulation and skills improvement offer people an increased opportunity to get a good job while becoming a student with an independent life brings people unforgettable experiences."
furya21   
Jul 23, 2011
Undergraduate / "To get my Bachelor's Degree in Digital Media" - Why UCF? [5]

Essay: The personal statements are a very important part of your application. They assist the university in knowing you as an individual, independent of test scores and other objective data. We ask that you respond to two of the topics below. Your personal statement should be no longer than a total of 500 words or 7000 characters for both statements combined. The best personal statements are not necessarily the longest ones.

3. Why did you choose to apply to UCF?

Before entering high school, everyone from peer to principal, had advised every student not to wait until senior year to decide on a college. As a 7th grader, I thought I had more than enough time to decide. Eventually, middle school ended and by my sophmore year, I realized, "I don't know what college I want!" My anxiety only deepened after hearing my closest friends brag about UCF, USF, UF and other combinations of the alphabet. I'm accustomed to always feeling like I'm on a different frequency from the rest of the crowd. But I was unable to understand why I hadn't chosen a college yet. I was more than 100% sure I wanted to study Graphic Design and Animation. It was the thought of trying to choose the perfect school that shook me to my core. Or rather, ending up at a school that wasn't right for me at all and squandering time and money on a complete failure of a choice. However, if I hadn't signed for the gaming magnet at Oak Ridge HS, I would never realize all the choices I had on my plate. The gaming magnet is a program that teaches students about video games, the history behind the business, basics, programming and how to start and create their own games. The program also gives students a chance to take a tour at not only colleges, but major game developers as well, like Electronic Arts. I had taken trips to Valencia and Orlando Tech, but it was my recent visit to the Florida Interactive Entertainment Academy that captivated me like no other school could. There I was able to explore the halls and many rooms dedicated to video game development and programming. Being able to see all the work and progress, all the designs and rough drafts and getting to do hands-on testing of student projects gave me the kind of chills that are sweet to the heart and bones. Everything about FIEA exihilirated me.T hat day that I decided my destiny lies in this school.

Please give me any critique that you feel I need. Any rearranging, misspellings, suggestions, improvements, anything at all.
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