Undergraduate / "My Future in Neuroscience" USC Neurosci Transfer [6]

Hey, last time I forgot to remove a few names from the essay so I deleted it. Please help out with the structure and grammar, I'm really nervous about it. I am begging for deep criticism, not just grammar (although I'd like that too).

------------------------------------

"Please provide a statement (250 words minimum) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.
Note: The Common Application essay should be the same for all colleges. Members that wish to review custom essay responses will request them on their Supplement form."

XXX College is a beautiful liberal arts school and has been my home for the last year and half. I am now beginning what will be my last term before I transfer to a university, and I know that I'll miss the campus and people I've met here. My professors and peers in the science departments have inspired me, and I now wish to pursue a major that XXX simply does not offer.

Making the decision to major in Neuroscience required me to get creative. The biological sciences in general are very research based, and Neuroscience is still an emerging field, so at most universities, opportunities for research begin at the undergraduate level. I've made close relationships with the science department heads, and they've embraced my initiatives to begin more research. So, I was ecstatic last semester to hear from the Chemistry department head that I'll be assisting him in a study on Carbon Dioxide sequestration. It may not be a groundbreaking neurological study, but so far it has definitely exposed me to the world of chemical research and publishing.

Attending a research-based university would be a dream come true for me. I really enjoy working in the lab and learning from Dr. XXX, who has been an amazing mentor and takes every chance he can to teach me something new. So, upon transferring, I hope to take part in more studies and put what I've learned to use. I've visited various campuses in Southern California to take tours of their Neuroscience and Biomedical Engineering departments, and was blown away by what could be accomplished by people my age. Papers are being written, and breakthroughs are taking place where resources are available to students, and my mission for the last year has been to prepare myself for that environment.

There is a certain joy that I experience when thinking about the complexity of living things, as if I were glancing into a greater truth. It has lead me to become immersed in my subjects, and desire to continue learning beyond the scope of the textbooks. No longer is it enough for me to simply learn a topic well enough to regurgitate it on an exam; I find joy in learning the reasons behind why they are true. In the last year, my interests have become fueled by current research, so when I read an article about a new chemical pathway in the brain, or how researchers were able to attach cancer identifying proteins to liposomes, I feel euphoric. My friends know that all it takes to see me light up is to mention liposomes, and I'll gladly talk for hours on the future of medicine and pharmaceuticals. So, I feel a need to be among likeminded people in an intellectually charged environment, a place where I can be challenged academically and stimulated by my peers.

My goals after transferring are very ambitious, but I'm so excited to be pursuing my dream that I'm sure it won't feel like work. I am absolutely a pre-medical major and plan to continue on to medical and graduate schools. I'm focused on the research aspect of the medical field, and plan to take part in graduate level research and eventually publish my own work. Neuroscientists in my generation will be responsible for breakthroughs that may hold the answers to curing once-thought fatal neurological diseases. I wish to be a part of that search, and would be grateful to be given to opportunity.

(words: ~550, I would like to get it in the 400s)
I realize I address quite a few topics in here, I'd like to cut a few out if possible. Tell me what didn't work.