Letters /
I and my family - we are planning to spend a weekend at a seaside hotel. Reservation letter [2]
Hadi,
I have just a few suggestions that may improve your letter.
First, instead of saying "Dear Sir" you should write "Dear [Hotel Name]". "Sir" implies that a man will be reading in which you are not sure of.
The first paragraph should be at the end in order to follow the order of instructions.
I like the intro to the second paragraph. Start right off though saying, "This is to inquire about the availability from August 13th-August 16th 2012" "My wife, son, and I will be visiting Beruit on these dates and hope to stay in your hotel." "I am looking for
a well furnished double deluxe balcony room suite with bath attached."
"In spite I am going to last my vacation on the weekend, please let me know your tariff and availability of the dates I have mentioned and a cost comparison with the other week days"
^^Not sure if your letter will be in English but if so, I would correct some English grammar here. First, it doesn't make sense and is a run on sentence. Try this - "Please let me know a price quote including these dates and the type of room mentioned. Also, are there different rates for weekdays and weekends?"
Last Paragraph: The instructions say to "enquire about activities and places of interest near the hotel" This means to ask questions about activities. Rephrase this paragraph to ask questions.
I read about your hotel in an advertisement in the People magazine. The most attractive thing to me is that I want to spend this annual vacation on a seaside area and get involved in some water sport activities.
Because your hotel has a good scope of sea view with plenty of water sports activities, like diving, surfing, jet ski, water football which is the most I have interested in.
^^I read about your hotel in an advertisement in the People magazine Not exactly necessary.
Possibly something like - Due to your sea side location, I have a few questions about which water sport activities are offered. I am interested in diving, surfing, jet skiing, and water football. Therefore, I was wondering if your hotel offers classes or instructors for any of these activities. [Also, you can ask about prices too]
Some more English errors-
I would
be appreciate
d if you would call me in
concern of regard to this reservation as soon as you can.
^ Remember to Include your phone number if you would like them to call you. Also, you could give the option to email back OR call. The "As soon as you can" seems very urgent.
I am looking forward to hear
ing from you soon. OR simply, "I look forward to hearing from you soon"
Also, "Yours Faithfully" seems VERY formal. Usually, you can just end letters like this one with a simple
Thank you,
Hadi Ibrhahim
Just a few improvements and you're good to go! Good luck!!!